Leaving a Legacy

2011-11-01T09:34:00.000-07:00

Good Morning Leaving A Legacy Friends!

We have moved the Leaving a Legacy Blog over to our NEW website

Come over for a visit and remember to subscribe!

Our hope and prayer is that we can minister to Marriages and families...
through focusing on leaving intentional legacies!
Come join me!

Blessings,

Angie Tolpin

The Most Important Legacy...

2011-10-28T23:32:00.000-07:00

What is the most important Legacy you want to leave your children?

Have you thought about it? I have been thinking about this a lot. It is very obvious for me to "label" the legacy

...Faith...

but the next question I asked myself is where I have been re-evaluating...

How do I spend my time with my children?

Since I home educate, I have all day everyday with my sweet blessings; but how much of my time is spent delighting in the Lord? Soaking up His Word? Do my Kids interrupt my Alone time with God? Do they see my time as a cherished time mommy is having with God? What stumbling blocks are in my way or do I think are in my way of preventing me to meet God everyday... during the day... while my kids are with me?

If I beleive the most important legacy I could leave my children is faith and relationship with Jesus Christ... how often am I modeling my faith and relationship for them to see? How often am I leading them into a deeper relationship with Christ, beyond doing the Bible Curiculum, or doing devotions at dinner because its our family routine. I'm not saying those things are bad... we need to be intentional about learning the word of God and teaching our Children God is in EVERYTHING... every subject in school. I have just been thinking about how I model my walk with God on a daily basis. I Love to serve out of obedience... I work hard every day and I diligently teach my children to work hard serving one another as well... however does the Martha in me consume my day... or do I make being a "Mary" and going to the feet of the Cross when I start getting tired a visible daily occurence. I model for my girls, being "busy in the home" because it is what we are called and blessed to do, but as a mom who loves Jesus, we also need and should yearn for time reading the Word of God, his letter to us, and model that desire.

Well the hard truth is simple...

If we aren't modeling that yearning for Christ and making time for Him, even randomly daily, little spits of time here and there... keeping our Bibles open on the counter... and every second we have a chance glances at this love letter that gives so much wisdom.

If we aren't doing it...

Well maybe its because that yearning isn't really alive in our hearts to begin with?

We can't fake it with kids.

They see it all, the good, the bad, & the ugly.

Do they see you yearning for Jesus every chance you get as if it were your power source or your living water?

Are We What We Eat?

2011-10-24T08:30:00.000-07:00

We've all heard the old adage, "You Are What You Eat."

While that statement isn't literally true, there is much truth to the fact that what we eat effects how we feel, it effects our health, and it effects our self image indirectly & for some of us directly.

I want to address 2 things in this post.

1) What we are feeding our families is leaving a legacy or creating habits in our children.

2)We have to be wary of allowing an extreme view of food to become an idol in our homes.

Habits are formed in our children, even without trying. What ever we do on a regular basis has potential for becoming a "habit" or legacy. For example, we juice and or make a smoothie with herbs, every day. Yep, everyday! When I first started this journey of juicing, it was hard to get over the work involved, cutting the veggies and fruit, cleaning the machine, and then there was the grocery bill (out the roof with organic yummies). But as we stuck with it, it just became part of our way of life, part of our schedule. It became a habit. Will my children do it when they grow up? Probably some of them, its hard to see now.

For some, eating fast food on a daily basis can be the habit. Others, might only make everything from scratch. Which ever applies to you, we all need to be aware that we are teaching our children by our example, what is acceptable and what attitudes towards food are acceptable.

We all need to be careful not to allow our dietary philosophies and conviction to become an idol. God warns us, in his good book against having idols and against disputing over things such as food, because it is not an eternal issue. Our diet should never prevent us from fellowship with others. When we teach our children we can only eat a certain way, and cater to that diet, they never learn how to be gracious and polite about "trying" and eating someone else's food... its a simple way to teach your child about having respect.

For example, we have a few kiddos with food intolerances, some more severe than others. There was a time when we needed to detox, so I was pretty strict about their diets, but within that time I also found how difficult it was to have fellowship (over meals) with people. Our commitment is to God, and to living healthy to treat our bodies as holy temples, so we can serve Him more actively.

"Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eater of meat..." Prov 23:20Here God likens gluttony to drunkenness... pretty serious.

"The one who keeps the law is a son with understanding, but a companion of gluttons shames his father." Prov. 28:7

"They have made me jealous with what is no god; they have provoked me to anger with their idols.So I will make them jealous with those who are no people; I will provoke them to anger with a foolish nation." Deuteronomy 32:21

"Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that "all of us possess knowledge." This "knowledge" puffs up, but love builds up. " 1 Cor. 8:1

As parents the habits we are teaching our children in regards to food can create idols, even for them, so we need to be on guard. We don't want to leave a legacy of idols, do we. On the other hand, how we feed our children also creates healthy eating habits or well no awareness. When we don't teach awareness, and we may not even be eating unhealthy, really... that as well can lead to unhealthy habits.

The point is this, what are we teaching our children... is there a balance of healthy awareness and conviction not to be a glutton... but a careful sensitivity to not allowing judgementalism or idols to be bred in our childrens' hearts as well.

What we eat and Teach is accpetable to Eat Leaves a Legacy!

Leaving A Legacy of Health

2011-10-20T06:00:00.000-07:00

This could potentially be a controversial post. Many people's ideas of what is "healthy" vary so drastically, so bare with me. The basic concept is this... What habits we currently model for our children on a day to day basis in the areas of exercise, food and dietary choices, medicinal preferences, and even mental health (staying stimulated and not going stagnate) are imprinting in them habits and what they envision themselves doing when the grow up.

Today I am going to tackle the topic of exercise, if you never exercise... then your children are most likely not going to envision themselves exercising as an adult... this kind of legacy can be dangerous to their health as it is dangerous to ours. Believe me this is a super convicting post- I am a work in progress- but especially in this area of my life. Unfortunately, it took me "sacrificing" my health in the name of caring for my family (really, making an idol out of my family in a way), thinking they were more important than taking care of myself... and in my mind of course my children are, but if I don't take care of myself, how can I take care of them. This became a huge reality for me these past 2 pregnancies when I found myself on bed-rest. I'm not saying that my being on bed-rest was all my fault, because I didn't exercise, but I will say that I might not be struggling as much as I do with all the symptoms I have if I would have made exercise a priority vs an option.

I think there is a problem among mother's today... "A Motherhood Martyr Myth!"
Or maybe its just me, in which case this post is more of a confession.
I used to think that I was a bad mom if I ever left my children, even to go to the doctor or to exercise.
I was constantly struggling in my mind because I already felt like I didn't have enough hours in the day to get everything I needed to get done with my kids and home, let alone, taking off to exercise. Then there is justifying paying someone to help take care of the precious ones while I exercise.
It seemed like such a "waste" of money, which furthered my guilt.
I am currently still in healing from this very oppressive thinking that you are the only one that should ever and only be with your children.
I personally am a healthier mommy, when I am able to get a serious focused exercise break in a couple times every week.

So what we have found works for our family is this...

2 days a week: I go to a gym that has a pool to do water therapy &/or strengthening exercises (weights)
I usually take Kelsey my oldest with me at least 1 day/week for her to learn how to use a gym and so we can have fun doing it together. This has also been a real productive time for my spirit to be filled... with technology devices today, I have been fortunate enough to take advantage of listening to sermons and talks as well as worship... which feeds my soul and helps me be a better mom during the rest of the week.
Then 2-3 days per week the kids and I have an exercise program we go through in our little at home gym... I rotate kids on bike/tread climber/ tumbling mat with our musical instruments and Taebo for kids video. It is fun! Definitely productive and helps get the wiggles out of my boys.
As for the other days of the week... the kids do swimming lessons 2 days per week and we have a small farm with lots of physical work! :)

Every family's convictions on this topic are so different, so please don't think you need to do it all like us. This is just what works for our family after much trial and error!

What does your family's physical life look like?

Leaving A Legacy of Work Ethic

2011-10-16T01:01:00.000-07:00

One of the Legacies I find myself very passionate about is Work Ethic. Something desperately wrong has happened to the youth of today. It's called low expectations on the parts of parents and the fulfillment of those low expectations by their children. Isaac and I went to a seminar years ago called the Household of Strength by Gregg Harris, where he talked about this concept in great depth. As Isaac and I sat there listening we were getting fired up, because we had so many conversations about this exact issue. We had decided years ago that we want to Leave a Legacy of strong work ethic which ultimately comes from having a vision for what you are accomplishing and an innate drive to compel you to take action and get it done.
I personally believe that work ethic is not something that is taught, it is caught... just like the love for reading, compassion, and so much more.

In order to teach work ethic, well you need to have some yourself, right???

Proverbs 21:25-26 says this:

"The desire of a lazy man kills him. For his hands refuse to labor. He covets greedily all day long, But the righteous gives and does not spare."

So what are some practical ways we like to practically teach work ethic?

Well we don't give allowance. Personal preference here, but we feel that the kids are part of a family unit, a team. If we all make a mess, then we all work diligently to get the mess picked up and then we can all enjoy the next activity together. We have taught our children that in life God gives us the gifts of "jurisdictions" in our life and as we show him (and our parents) we are "responsible" with little, we are then given greater responsibilities. With greater responsibilities comes greater privileges. What are some privilege's??? Staying up a little later is one example. Now, don't get me wrong... we desire our children to understand how to handle money wisely (another post), so we do have extra chores they can do to make a little Dough! $$$

One Tolpin Family Motto is this:

"Work Hard, Play Hard"

The Motto is all fine and dandy, but your kids needs to see you work.

Practice what you preach... don't just have them do our weeding... go outside and weed with them. We pay $.01 per weed with roots and certain days I surprise the kids with double days or double hour and they can make more. I find that the kids are eager to get there "responsibilities finished if they know they can look forward to earning money by doing the extra jobs.

Leaving a Legacy of Purposefully Working Hard & with the Right Attitude

If I grumble and complain while I do the dishes, how can I expect my children to do it with any better of an attitude. We have to be modeling the right heart attitudes and teaching them the "Reasons behind WHY we do these things."

What Legacy Are You Leaving?

2011-10-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

Our decisions, our training & discipleship, our passion, our purpose-fullness or lack there of, our work ethic, our political beliefs, our personal philosophies, our discipline or lack there of, our selfishness and sin, our mistakes, our conflict strategies (anger & intimidation/manipulation/interrogation/aloof judgement), our expectations, our lifestyle, our priorities, our "realness" or facade, our faith or lack there of; all these things and so much more play a part in the legacy we leave in our children.

As parents, we are imprinting what "parenting and marriage"look like in our childrens' subconscience and conscience minds. We are their example (or role model) for how a parent is supposed "parent"and how an adult Christian is supposed "worship or pray or obey" Christ. We are their example of how to treat others with love & respect. How to practice Patience, Integrity, and Self-Control. We teach them frugality or frivaliousness. We teach them to be concerned about the heart or to be consumed with outward appearances. We teach them how to treat friends and how to be "real." We teach them to LEAD or Conform and Follow. Our marriage and how we treat our spouse models to our children so many different things. It models what we beleive about Biblical Manhood & Womanhood, it models real life examples of how marriages interact and treat one another, we model how to resolve conflict, how to work as a team. We model the good, the bad and the ugly of every area of life... dont' we. We have an incredibly important duty & privilege. To "help" mold the future generations, you hear this all the time. Teachers motto is teaching the "next generation." Parents, you still have the most influence. You were chosen to be the parent. Not the teacher, youth pastor, or coach. You were given this precious gift in your child.

How serious are you going to take your responsibility?

Feeling the pressure yet? Isn't it HEAVY! Fortunately, for us all, there is a God who is full of grace & more sufficient than necessary for redeeming our children, even with all of our mistakes and sins. Jesus is full of Grace for us and the mistakes we make, but he can redeem them and use even our sins to bring forth fruit. As we humbly come to Jesus, aware of our mistakes and repent. And as we take our relationships with our children seriously enough to be humble and apologize, teaching them about the sin of even our hearts. We are teaching them self-control, kindness, humility, forgiveness, and grace.

Come Back again soon as I will be posting more ideas on the Leaving a Legacy.

Getting Ready to Make New Friends

2011-10-13T01:27:00.000-07:00

I'm so excited I can hardly wait... in a just a few short weeks I will be in PA @ the Relevant Conference 2011! My sweet hubbie, Isaac surprised me with a ticket the other day! This will be my first time traveling across states by myself in YEARS! So in an attempt to get to know some of the other purposefully bloggin' mamas going this year, this post is a little scrapbook look into my life.

(photo is a year old- sorry)

What is the Vision for Leaving a Legacy?

Well this blog is a work in progress. It started out a few years ago as a "scrapbook of sorts." For family to keep up with the kids and what we are doing. Then I got inspired by other friends & my husband who were blogging, to share my thoughts, passions, experiences, and life lessons & reflections if you will. Then a season of busy-ness and lack of motivation hit. I felt like, there are so many awesome blogs out there already, I don't really have the time to do all I want to without sacrificing my family, so I took a break. A big break. Last February, I started getting asked by men & women my husband worked with to start blogging about marriage & business bc I love to talk with all the wives and encourage them. It has been my heart & my ministry within Isaac's work. Then as I started writing, I felt the Lord start teaching me and leading me to rethink what the vision should be. SO that's where we are at now. I am in a season of visioneering! I am sharing thoughts and passions I have had for a long time, but never took the time to post about. For me, its just being truly who I am, on purpose, sharing from my own struggles and learned lessons; trying to allow God to use me as a small vessel for His purposes from this little area in my kitchen.

About Me?

Simply a woman seeking to honor God with my all! I recognize every perfect gift comes from above and I am so thankful for all the good blessings He has gifted me with. I have been married for 12 years to my awesome hubby, Isaac Tolpin. We have been entrusted with six sweet children (11, 8, 6, 5, 3, 14months old), whom we are so thankful to be able to raise and teach from home. Together as a family we have a planted and tended our small (1300 plant) Vineyard called Damascus Vineyards; which by the way we will be harvesting for the first time soon. Isaac and I have built a few businesses together over the years. We have been so fortunate to have experienced a deep connection doing so together. I am a Licensed CVI Coach, offering Christian Content Rich Life Coaching/ Mentoring for Wives of Leaders and Business Execs and in certain cases Women Entrepreneurs through Choose Growth. Together with my husband, through our company Choose Growth, we now offering Executive Marriage Strengthening Seminars utilizing an instrument called the Core Values Index.

Other info to know:

I love knowledge and helping people by sharing it
I like cooking kind of, but have a daughter who LOVES it
I am a huge advocate for natural birth- water birth to be more specific
I am intrigued by natural medicine and have been using primarily homeopathy & herbs for treatment in my home for 4 years
Hospitality is a huge part of our Family Ministry- & we love it
My love language is "words of affirmation"-communication
I like to garden and work outside, but it is hard on my aching bones and back.
As a family we, we LOVE to vaca in our RV!
I am pretty opinionated
My fears: Being Judged or accused of Judging, not being loving or being loved (liked)
I struggle with being a people pleaser
My whole life I have struggled with forgiveness- I am a transformed grudge holder
Obsessed with the book of Proverbs
I like make-up and dressing up for dates with my husband (any reason to dress up really)
I love talking business with my husband and helping him

My Passions and Mission:

To Leave a Legacy in my family, my children & in this world. Not a legacy that glorifies me, but that Glorifies the One Worthy of Glory and Praise. I want to leave a legacy of a strong marriage, a deep relationship wit the Lord, a legacy of Grace, empowerment, a legacy of integrity and love. Though I preach that we are saved by Grace alone...I want to leave a legacy of be a doer of the word, not just a hearer. I do so many things in the name of "leaving a legacy," but I am learning now to put my most energy into the legacies that will reap eternal fruit, not artificial outward appearance.

Leaving a Legacy

2011-10-11T22:51:00.000-07:00

As parents, we are all leaving a legacy. Whether we recognize or not, we are leading our children, helping to "shape" them if you will. It can be a scary, and awakening reality when you think about the responsibility. Or it can be an exciting challenge that brings more purposefulness to your "everydays" with your children. The empowering truth, is that God is the creator of life and of families. He choose you to be your child's parent. When I get overwhelmed by the task at hand, I find encouragement and grace in that simple fact.

Jeremiah 1:5

⁵ “Before I formed you in the womb I knewyou,
before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

This passage teaches that God loves and has a purpose for us even before we're born--that from the very beginning of our lives, God has a unique plan for us. It's not just true for us parents as individuals, but also for our children. And God choose you to be the parent of your son or daughter. He has confidence in you as a parent... but you have to trust Him and allow Him to speak to you and guide in the decisions you make as a parent.

I hope you will join me on this journey of discovering what it means to Purposefully Leave a Legacy

Socialization? To School or Not to School?

2011-10-10T00:21:00.000-07:00

I was recently inspired to blog about the whole "Socialization" controversy that tends to "attack" home schooling families. Its always funny to me when I get asked why do we home school? I have to laugh; because, if you have home schooled for any amount of time at all... boy... that question is opening a whole can of worms... isn't it! It is not a simple answer, at all. In fact, its probably one of the hardest questions my husband and I have ever made... or at least it seemed like it at the time. Now home schooling is just our way of life. It's part of our family culture... part of our identity if you will.

So to start of this concise opinion on socialization here is my disclaimer... remember this is merely my opinion, based on observation, experience, research & reading... but still just my opinion.

Here's the definition of Socialization from Dictionary.com:

so·cial·i·za·tion

[soh-shuh-luh-zey-shuhn] noun

1. a continuing process whereby an individual acquires a personal identity and learns the norms, values, behavior, and social skills appropriate to his or her social position.

2. the act or process of making socialistic: the socialization of industry.

There it is folks... clearly by definition I do not want my children to be conformed to the pattern of the "Oregon, liberal public educational system/government/western adulterous culture" but rather "transformed by the renewing of their mind. Then "they"will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will." Rom 12.

When someone asks me:"what about Socialization?" I say... have you seen a room full of public schooled 11 year olds? I hope & pray my daughter doesn't "acquire her personal identity and learn the norms, values, & behavior and social skills appropriate" from that environment!

Here is a question I like to ask people: "Do you only have friends that are 29 or 35(whatever your age is)? Do you only work with people your age?" Of course not, so it is not preparing the children for the real world in regards to "socialization." If school is "socially preparing children for the real world" then how come seniors make fun of and ignore the freshman? How come the 6th graders won't play with the 3rd graders? In the real world the Montessori Method of age integration is much healthier for preparing children to work with all kinds of people of different ages and be able to adapt to work with different levels of learners as well as people.

Schools do indoctrinate our children and peers do influence them as well. I fully admit I am indoctrinating & influencing my children... oh yes, and by God's good graces... hopefully they will grow up to be like-minded brothers and sister in Christ.

Another argument: Don't you want them to be able to have conversations with people in the real world? And not be awkward?

My rebuttal: The home schooled children I know are the most well adjusted, capable of having conversations with any age (not just their own given age), and the most respectful too I might add. It is all to common even amongst private schooled children, for children to disrespect authority or elders. If I might be bold enough to say... it is rare to find schooled children who can make eye contact with another adult and engage them in conversation because they honestly want to. This has not been my experience in the home school community. To end this rebuttal... the only thing odd about my children is that they can have a conversation with anyone of any age. Since I know I am not the only who notices that 12 year olds have difficulty even "caring" to talk to their friends moms... I have a opposing question to ask... is "not being awkward" mean they should have a bad attitude? Or that if they can play with a 5 year old there must be something wrong with them? You see all these things can be accomplished by home schooling families as well. You have to teach and train your children not to have selfishness and disrespect bound up in their hearts... over and over again... you have to confront not so easy issues... over and over again. Not all home schooling families do either. But this is why socialization by a school environment doesn't work for our family! :)

Another argument I hear about socialization is well don't you want your kids to fit in the world?

My Clear answer: Ummm... NO! I do not want my children to be like everyone else. I am not impressed by the fruit I am seeing in the Jr. highs or the high school for that matter. I pray they don't turn out like the rest of the world. For crying out loud, we are Christians... aren't we supposed to "look" different.

Socialization - who they spend their time with and conform to- is a form of education- often called "peer education." I am socializing my children to one another, our family and other like-minded people who live with integrity and conviction... I sure hope they pick up some of that "indoctrination." It's part of the point. Socialization is not a problem, we got it "under control, " with plenty of the right kind! :)

Thriving Marriages & Thriving Businesses:Part 6

2011-10-06T00:32:00.000-07:00

Compartmentalizing Life? Aren't We a Team?

What is it? He has his job, you have your job. He has his responsibilities, you have yours. He has his "jurisdictions," you have yours. He has his side of the closet, you have yours. He goes to work, its his deal, what does it have to do with you? You have your work (even if it is in the home), what does it have to do with him? Get the picture?

Couples throughout the generations have been married and landed into categories similar to these:

They have either Thrived, Survived, or Failed.

They either experienced the thrill of the journey of marriage, or stayed contentedly married, or they have gotten divorced, or stayed married but experienced a stagnate or unfulfilled, maybe even depressing marriage.

What sets "thriving marriages" apart from "surviving marriages" or "failing"marriages?

Even tougher question is posed for those who not only are married, but also have a family business of some kind (working together or not).

How do we have a "thriving" marriage & run a business, and not just any business, a successful, thriving business?

Well if you are business owners of some kind, you've most likely asked yourself these questions or argued with your spouse over these types of crucial issues...

How do we NOT allow it (the business) to "become our life?"

How do we protect our marriage from the business?

Here's an argument for you:

He (or she) is a Work Aholic! I never see them!

The Ultimatum: "It's me or the Business!!!"

All they ever want to do is Build the business... is this our relationships Identity?

How many times could I have been tempted to say these things over the years! Wow! I am not going to lie... I've gone there before. Being married to a man who is a leader with a vision to make impact and do it well, not just well, but give it his best... well it can be hard.

You know the old term if you can't beat em, join em. There were times in our marriage (in the early years) when I had to go on autopilot and "join em,'' bc I couldn't beat em'. I have to tell you, those were not our most successful years, for our marriage or our business. But I learned something in that season. In making the decision to "join" my husband instead of being "against" him (always nagging, frustrated with the work hours, etc) we experienced a change in our marriage as well as our business. The problem was that I wasn't on his team.

When Isaac started inviting me to be more involved, our marriage strengthened and then our business grew even more, then I would get more involved, and our business would grow more. When I mention getting "involved" I don't mean actually going to the office and "working," no my work was different. It was supporting my man, trying hard not to be a thorn in his side, but a helper to him.

I could share much about the changes we saw, what roles I took on to be more involved, etc.

However, the most significant change occurred when our perspective on life changed. Isaac and I always saw a larger purpose behind why he was working where he was. It wasn't just a "job" it was a mission. There was a purpose he was working with this company and we kept our focus on our faith and the confidence that we were where we were for a greater purpose than to make money, a greater purpose than to be "successful." When that shift happened and we began to integrate more and more of the business with our family life even... then the business started to explode and thrive. A ripple effect was our marriage growing and making us a stronger TEAM.

I firmly believe we believe a lie called BALANCE.

We try to compartmentalize our lives... so much that wives don't even know who their husbands work with anymore. This is dangerous bc most affairs are introduced through work- statistically. We have discovered that real life is best when our expectations of balance is put in its rightful place. Our philosophy concerning "balance" and "compartmentalizing" is that this type of lifestyle is not fully transparent and can lead to disappointment bc expectations can hardly be met when striving to run a thriving business.

What accountability is there for a man when his family life is so separated from his work life?

You can have a "successful business" and have balance.... but I recognize, being married to a man who is an engaged leader, that thriving has a different definition to him. A thriving business is one that is evolving, growing, inspiring & helping people, but is also relevant to today's economy and ever reinventing itself to stay relevant. That kind of a business is not one that can go without dynamic interactions by a leader... therefor an ever changing, growing, adapting business is going to require a leader who can feed it. A spouse of a leader like that is going to need to have grace yes, but also needs to understand the vision and understand that balance the way it looks for "her friends" lives may never look like hers. She needs to find ways to engage her husband and help him so they can have time together. I find as I help my husband it frees him up to have more time with us as a family...

Solution:

We engage all of Isaac's businesses together as often as possible. We don't compartmentalize our life. I try to support him as often as I can, going to meetings, get trained, learn, traveling with him as often as we can afford to, learning what he is learning, I even read some of the same books, I don't just think "oh that's his work." I engage his people, I try to know who he works with and the significant others of who he works with vs. not trying to get to know them. We love & care about the people who work with Isaac and want to see them grow. When you are living on purpose and have a purpose behind what you do for a living, you believe in your product or opportunity, you can get behind the vision and embrace it, not fight it.

Yes we work hard, but with no regrets! Our work has purpose and we have the feeling of TEAM in our efforts. I often find myself editing late at night and giving advice on website aesthetics and so on. It is fun and engaging. Our marriage is so full of so much life and change and growth! Thriving is thrilling and my prayer is that if you are running a business... or married to someone who is... that you could be encouraged to work as a team and not expect compartmentalization but rather find realistic expectations that you can both be encouraged by and excited about.

From a biblical perspective, I believe God designed us to work better in teams. As a married couple, you are perfectly matched, you complement one another and make one another stronger. If you allow God to use your marriage to be a light and minister to those around you, you will find it is better to give than to receive. As you help others and work as a team, you will be blessed spiritually as well as in your marriage. There is no better feeling than to serve God by serving your spouse...

I know my heart overflows and I am so proud of my husband. I strive to be his biggest cheerleader! I hope and pray the same feelings overwhelm your marriage! May God bless you!

The Wrestling in My Soul

2011-10-04T23:14:00.000-07:00

For some time now, there has been a wrestling in my soul.
At times the restlessness looks like disappointment, at times frustration, at times lack of confidence, lack of concentration because I get so distracted by what I think I should be pursueing, uncertainty of what God has planned for me. My greatest personal desire in life, aside from all the "motherly hopes and dreams" one has for her children, is to be obedient to Christ and to take ACTION for Him. I want my life to count for something, don't we all. Not for me, but for Christ. God created us all for individual purposes, I REALLY have an aching desire to fulfill the reasons He made me. Don't you?

Personally, I don't want to wake up and regret my life or feel the empty burden of feeling like I could've, should've, but didn't. You know when you life comes to that place where you can either step out, do what's hard, really hard, make the sacrifices, not knowing what the outcome will be, but being true to who you are, who God made you to be and gifted you as or you can just do what's normal, what you have always done, and dream and kind of pursue, but not really.

Not really give it your all because you are simply AFRAID.
Yes afraid, afraid of failure, afraid of what others might think, afraid of the cost (financial or time). Regardless you are afraid. Then comes the time when you have to decide... are you going to not take action... just keep your thoughts and all the lessons you have learned to yourself, or are you going to do something with them? Every day over and over the thoughts, consume you, actually giving you headaches because you have so much information you want to share but not enough of you to go around. You aren't willing to sacrifice your time with family to do these things you are feeling called to do, but then you realize in that moment... it wouldn't be a sacrifice because if you just began to take action to be who you know you are inside your mind and heart, then you will be more alive, more joyful, less stressed, less overwhelmed, and you will be leaving a legacy. Leaving a Legacy that leads. Leads your children because they watch you do what's hard and then they respect you for it... because they saw the trials you overcame to persevere through it. I home school my kids and one tiny part of why we do it is so I can teach them to do the "hard" things in life that we are called to do; but how can I fully "teach" it if I am not doing it. It may look like I'm "doing" a lot from the outside looking in. We are busy, a house with 6 kids under 11 is busy, right?! But I admit there are times when I choose to do the easy things rather than the harder ones. I get distracted by dishes, laundry, messes, the list goes on and on. As you know! The thing that bothers me at my core though, is this... those things aren't eternal. Yes they need to get done, but laundry isn't eternal. All "always" having clean laundry in the drawers will do is lay some pretty lofty expectations my boys may have for their future wives- and I don't want that. oh we all have that inner Mary/Martha Struggle don't we... to a certain degree. The distracted stressful part is when you have that nagging voice in your head calling you to do something hard, but you keep finding excuses not to do it... (oh, I got to go to the grocery store). The annoying part for me is this... I have got to get the voice that is calling me to take action out of my head... I mean I can't sleep at night. The only way to do that, is to Take Action.

Oh the taste of the glory of taking action, not just thinking, thinking, thinking about taking action, but truly taking action and doing something.

That CHOICE is everyday... that choice is today... choose growth... be who you really are, not who your fear tells you to be.

Courageous

2011-10-01T19:11:00.000-07:00

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Just watched this movie... it is out this weekend in Portland... check out the website here...
Courageous

If we all go to the movie... it will get to be in more cinemas... it all depends on this weekend!

Kids Consignment Sale

2011-09-28T09:42:00.000-07:00

Your Kids to My Kids

Leaving a Legacy: Teaching our kids about Pregnancy and Childbirth

2011-09-24T11:16:00.000-07:00

Leaving a Legacy: Teaching our kids about Pregnancy and Childbirth

Get Wisdom

2011-09-21T23:41:00.000-07:00

Get Wisdom
by Ruth Younts

This is such a sweet little devotional handbook on the topic of God's Wisdom.
One of my favorite things is finding new devotionals to teach the kids about our Lord Jesus. This little book is so handy at lunch time or whenever for teaching on a topic like "Mercy" or "Obedience." You can read it directly and ask the heart probing questions, have a child read the bible verse and pray together, or you can take it and expand on it.

Just thought I would share this great resource!
God Bless!
Go to Get Wisdom for more info or Christianbook.com has it for $7.19

CAUGHT NOT TAUGHT- THE LOVE FOR READING

2011-08-29T22:12:00.000-07:00

"CAUGHT NOT TAUGHT"

That's right... Reading time! As a home school mother I have been convicted lately and I thought I would share. As I have been planning the new years activities, curriculum and those sort of things... I felt a conviction to change up the schedule. You see while we read a ton at our house... there hasn't ever been a need for a "scheduled time where everyone just sits down to read for a chunk of time, all at once. I usually find my reading time early in the morning or late at night after most of my chores are done... which isn't every day... depending on how the day went. Got to be flexible over here at the Tolpin House since we've got 6 kids under 11 over here! :) It's a good challenge for a control- freak like me! The kids have reading time throughout the day. They read of course when they are doing school work and when we do our Bible time, stuff like that. And I have a daughter who is ADDICTED to reading, which is great except that when I need her to be helping with other things, she is usually off reading somewhere and then finds herself in trouble for reading... crazy isn't it... I know!
So I have been feeling a conviction for a while now to dedicate an hour to just reading. All of us at the same time. We can all be in the same room, but we don't have to. This is a separate time from doing our devotion time... it is dedicated to just reading... whatever they want to read. If they want to read the Bible more, great, that is FANTASTIC. But this way it will force me to read during the day with them.
One of my favorite quotes is this:
"It's CAUGHT, not TAUGHT"

I don't know who said it originally, we've all heard it, but I believe this is so true for so many things in life with children. Learning to Love learning, love reading, love knowledge and understanding, to love the Word of God, all of those things are going to be caught, not taught and how can my kids "catch" the fever of loving to learn and loving to read if I am not doing it.
I want my kids to remember mom reading the Word of God, being on my knees, reading, excited to learn new things with them and discover new things with them.
The best test to see if your kids are seeing you model something is to ASK them. The other day I asked Kelsey, Austin, & Megan how important they thought reading was to me? Their response was shocking, they said not as important as email mom. Woooooooow! Convicting eh?! Right??!! Then I asked them how often they see me reading, just for the joy of it, not in a cook book or homeopathy book, those don't count... they said, "not very often." It shocked me bc I read a lot... but I realized I read when they are sleeping. Most parents do, you don't get interrupted as often, right! But NO, this isn't right. If we want them to love reading, its caught, not taught. So now we are going to allow for an hour a day for just leisure/ knowledge/edification reading. I'm super excited! Now when one of my children is reading and gets stuck on a word, I won't sigh that sigh of "your interrupting me I'm doing the dishes"... instead, I will be reading too and won't be distracted by doing other things bc its "reading hour." See how I just freed myself up to be a better mom that's not so snappy!
CAUGHT, NOT TAUGHT!

Thriving Marriages Part 5: Lead Me

2011-08-20T10:12:00.000-07:00

Lead Me

"I look around and see my wonderful life
Almost perfect from the outside
In picture frames, I see my beautiful wife
Always smiling, but on the inside

Oh, I can hear her saying

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, but what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes
They're just children from the outside
I'm working hard, I tell myself they'll be fine
They're independent, but on the inside

Oh, I can hear them saying

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone

So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I'm called to be
Oh Father, show me the way
To lead them

Won't You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can't
Don't want to leave them hungry for love
Chasing things that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this our home
Lead me 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me 'cause I can't do this alone"
by Sanctus Real

This song is amazing... It moves me... because from a Mother's perspective... I can not do it all myself... from a wife's perspective... yes of course there have been times when I've felt this way... yes even being married to my visionary husband who is so focused on productivity.
The point is, none of us are perfect. None of us can have that void in our souls filled by any other human or by any earthly thing or experience. Only Jesus Christ can fill us up and give us the supernatural strength to do "all we are called to do."

In Marriage, Women are crying out for men to stand up and lead. Even the most feminist women desire to be cherished, loved, respected, to have their man sacrifice and fight for them, to show them they are still the love of their life. As women we have so many expectations on our men, being raised in the generation I have been raised, we have been raised in, their is a continuous battle to be independent and tough and do it all on our own and to desire our man to really cherish us and protect & provide for us. I'm going out on a limb here to say this to some of you, but my personal belief is that our identity needs to be found in Christ alone. But in regards to our husbands, we need to let them do what they were created to do, which is protect & provide, to be willing to die for their bride. That means we need to battle this independent spirit within us and work to be a TEAM, not adversaries that compete. If our energies were spent focused on complimenting one another and helping one another, submitting to one another, giving vs. always taking, if we focused on our team oneness and sought out to build one another up... imagine the strength.
Men, stand up and be strong...
the traditional pattern in life has been, when men don't stand up, women do and then the men don't fulfill their God-given roll... what do you think happens to a man who has his power taken away? What happens to a man who has no purpose? What happens to a family when these things happen to the man? When happens to the church when it is full of men who have experienced this in their lives? What happens to our government when it is comprised of men who were raised in homes with father's who were discouraged out of standing up? What happens to our nation, our world?
What happens? Answer is 75% divorce rate, children raised in single parent homes or split between parents, stress, depression, disease, addiction, I could go on and on...
So Men Rise up, young men, you are in boot camp, get ready, practice leading, be on purpose.
Women, let your men lead. Women, we have enough responsibility with our homes, our children, other younger women.... that should be MORE than enough to keep us busy... let men lead men so they don't have lower self esteem...
Husbands, Love your wives and children... truly... I am so blessed with my husband bc he really tries proactively to lead in our home and marriage. But just as in this song... from the outside certain lives can look perfect... don't be fooled... our life isn't perfect. I strong marriage takes fighting for...we are all human...are equally struggling with sin in life, but when you are honest with struggles you can proactively fight against them.

May God Give Your Strength for the good fight!

Check out this song....
Sanctus Real

"Building Thriving marriages & Thriving Businesses Part 4:The Comparison Trap"

2011-04-27T07:49:00.000-07:00

The Comparison Trap

We have all been there... that time old comparison trap... and aren't we women the WORST at it? Or maybe it just has the ability to eat us up more than men?
I'm sure you've all read the books on friendship that have chapters dedicated to "comparing" yourself to other women and how dreadfully dangerous that can be.
I know I have personally struggled with this one since I was a young girl in elementary school. I would sit in my desk hearing the "whanwhanwhan" Charlie Brown noise the teacher would make... and my mind would be off in the distance... doing that "inner talking" even in pre-k and kindergarten... that inner talking would begin and my confidence would diminish. As a young growing lady... in Jr.high... that inner talking sounded like this... "is what I am wearing cute?"..."I want to be friends with her, but I don't think she would ever talk to me." You see it starts very young and surfacy; and then it grows into a beast, unless you tame it.

Being married and "older," I can tell you that inner talking can get you into trouble with your marriage as well. The first few years of our marriage, Isaac had to work really hard to build his territory of work. It has paid off for sure. I am so proud of how He has done over the years in leading the company to new standards. However, it has not always been easy. Relationships are very important to me and so after we got married we found friends in the same or similar season of life, naturally right?! Well, to this day, I'm not sure if my friends now this but, about 8 years ago I really struggled with comparing my husband to their husbands. There I said it... what no one would admit ... right??? The type of comparisons I would make regularly were things like, "Her husband is home at 3 every afternoon... my husband works early and late every day." I would get so upset when Isaac had to work during an "event" all our friends were able to go to. I would compare my husbands work schedule to my friend's husband's work schedules. If your husband is an entrepreneur, you will understand what I am talking about.
But Ladies, I am here to tell you, it is not healthy. Comparing is NEVER productive. God gave you a different man, with different talents than your friend's husbands, with a different ministry/purpose to fulfill on this earth. I know look back and think wow... often times the main "arguments" Isaac and I got into were due to me comparing ...his work schedule and commitments limited "my" involvement with friends... I wouldn't be able to go out to dinner with girlfriends very often or go on women's retreats bc my husband had to work... and I would sit at home thinking about how they were all having a great time while I was "stuck" at home changing poopy diapers. My perspective had to change! Instead of comparing, I had to realize that, God paired Isaac and I together for a greater purpose than me getting to go out every once in a while. Once I really got behind my man and started supporting him, all the time, not just when it was convenient, there was a break through in our marriage. My nagging diminshed greatly! You see nagging happens because wives have unfulfilled expectations. When you compare your husband, his work schedule, or job, or even the amount of money he makes to any other woman's man... you are created expectations that are unrealistic and unfair to your husband. Unrealistic expectations can lead only to disappointment and a weakened marriage. A weakened marriage is the perfect target for satan to attack and win. (If you aren't a believer and don't believe in satan, realize that the result is still indefinite, a failing marriage rather than a thriving one, you are in a battle).
If you want a Thriving Marriage and not just a Mediocre Marriage, if you want a marriage that is Growing and not just Stagnate and "ordinary", you have to work at it. It takes more than jut having "date nights," although we love those too. It takes being introspective and honest with yourself on areas in your marriage YOU can improve. Where are you at fault, what unrealistic expectations do you put on your spouse that fuels nagging or negative inner talking?
Once you start extinguishing these little fires in your thoughts, your marriage can grow and produce so much fruit.
My prayer is that as wives, we would look at our men as special individuals which God created unique. Our men have different gifts, abilities, and callings in life. It is our job as their wives to be their biggest cheerleaders and support- not the antagonistic nagging women they never want to come home to. Let them be uniquely who they are... don't force them to mold to be they way you want them... don't try to change your man... don't live trapped thinking..."this is the way I am... he just needs to accept me for who I am." No fight those inner talking battles and win the fight.
If you can Avoid the Comparison Trap you will have so much more joy!
God Bless!

Joy for Resurrection Day!

2011-04-24T00:42:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 53:3-12
"He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering...
Surely He took up our infirmities
and carried our sorrows
yet we considered him stricken by God,
smitten by him, and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed...
By oppression and judgement he was taken away...
Yet it was the Lord's will to crush him and cause him to suffer,
and though the Lord makes his life a guilt offering...
and he will bear their iniquities...
because he poured out his life unto death and was numbered with transgressors.
For He bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

John 1:29
"Behold the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world."

After he appeared to them he said,
"Peace be with you"
"Put your fingers here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe."
"Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."
John 20:26-29

Hosanna! He is Risen! Jesus is Alive!
Let us not just celebrate an Easter Holiday or Tradition...
Let us embrace Jesus and be spiritually moved and grow by being overwhelmed by who He is and what He has done for us. Let us be transformed by the renewing of our minds in Christ Jesus Today!
May He Bless You All through Eternity!

Building Thriving Marriages & Thriving Businesses Part 3

2011-03-21T09:41:00.000-07:00

Hospitality

One of the most obvious ways to be involved in your husband's business is through Hospitality. This message is for women, all women who are married, regardless of their husband's career choice. There is always some way we can reach out, if our husbands can get into the thought of "reaching out" to those God puts in their path on a daily basis. However, I must say that in our personal experience it has been easier to practice hospitality with NorPac since we get to attempt to create the culture. I know that certain professions may pose "significant obstacles" with this idea; however, my challenge would be to encourage each of us to look at the impact we are or are not having in our work place or husband's work place. I believe that if your husband is following God's calling on his life in regards to "what career path" he has chosen, then as a TEAM it is our responsibility to be purposeful on a daily basis to reach out in the name of Christ.
Our culture and world is a "busy" society that has too many activities scheduled and too many more important things to do. The majority of the culture, lives a life consumed by "doing" things that take them away from home so often they couldn't possibly have the time to have people over for dinner. We live in a self- indulged culture that doesn't take the "time" to bless others by having them to their homes. As a Christian, I believe that we are placed where we are for a reason. My husband is placed where he is for a reason. I highly doubt that from God's great omnipotent, omniscient perspective he thinks its "just" to make money. God has a bigger more eternal life plan! I would like to challenge you to ask yourself the question??? How are you playing your role in making impact in the lives of those God has naturally placed in your life, through your work or your husbands work??? Are you keeping your life Compartmentalized??? Balanced? More on this concept later!

Hospitality is a way for us as Christians to make our faith have legs! I don't know how many times over the past 12 years of marraige I have served a young college student or couple dinner and an evening at our house and heard the comments or questions like... "I come from a broken home, how do you guys make marriage work?" or "wow, how come you guys home school? did you always think you would have so many children?" These are great questions that have deeper faith based answers for us. Marriage isn't always easy, but in having Christ as our center of our relationship he redeems us and our marriage. When we have conflict, Jesus is supreme and His Love in us helps us to try to keep a more Eternal perspective on things, which leads us to forgive and trust one another. We are a TEAM! God joined us together and we believe there is a battle out there, we call him satan. He will try his best to make us ineffective for the kingdom of God. We have an understanding that we are not ever enemies, we trust each other, believe in one another and believe that the other has our best interest at heart. Another blessing to us is having our children with us at these events, to let them be their charming"selves."They aren't perfect as you can see in this picture of Luke picking his nose, but they are a joy and a blessing to Isaac and I and we want to share that love for family with others. As far as the other questions we get when we practice hospitality... those are for another post someday. My point is that hospitality can be such an impactful team effort to fulfill the great commission and it really is a command.
Many women think they have to have a big home to have people over.... that is obviously not true... we all know it is a lie. But just to give you an example, when Isaac and I were first married we lived in a tiny little 450 sq ft apartment, and we had people over. We had a fold up table and fold up chairs from his office as our kitchen table... and we didn't care. We didn't let it stop us from having people over. After living there we moved to a townhouse that was just 795 sq ft were half of that was upstairs with bedrooms, but we didn't let that stop us either. Late night BBQs with the guys from work. I don't even know how many times in those first 6 years of marriage Isaac would call me on his way home saying..."hey can the guys come over? And honey can you make something for them to eat? enchiladas?".... got to love that at 10 pm while you have 1, 2, or 3 babies/kids sleeping! :) Really, it was my pleasure, to know that my husband wanted to be home with me, that he could count on me to help him out in this way, and I also saw how this was my opportunity to help grow the business.
Serving your husband in this way will have many positive outcomes. To start it could help grow the business. People who work with your husband will feel appreciated, and in turn your husband could rise to a place of influence and could be more respected. It will also encourage your marriage because you will be more involved as a TEAM in what your husband is doing, and it is true that 2 R Better Than 1!
Hospitality also serves as a way for you to protect your marriage. How many divorces occur because the wife at home is oblivious to the "affair" at the office. I think that it is wise for any married woman who's husband works in a world with women to try to know "who" they work with. As the wife, we need those women to know and respect us to protect our marriages. For the past nine years we have hosted an annual Cutco Christmas party at our home. This is a HUGE event that has grown from 30 people in those first few years to well over 100 now. Hosting this event in my home has provided me the opportunity to meet and talk with some of those women my husband works with. This has also served to be a time of valuing those who work for us/ with us. We are able to really appreciate them together... many organizations do not do that. We make this event a family affair, involving the children and allowing them to be who they are and let their little lights shine. Including the children in this type of purposeful hospitality is teaching them how to love and serve all kinds of people, not just "like-minded" believers, but truly loving all people, like Jesus would...having them in your home.
Another aspect to hospitality is always having a room ready for guests to stay. We have gone in and out of doing this over the years, but it has not ever slowed us down from having people stay from out of town in our home. I can proudly say that even with being on bedrest we have had a consistent amount of people who stay over night with us from all over. Family, friends, old coworkers, people who work with us. Of course it seems to often all happen in the same month- naturally right? But we get a TON of use out of our guest room and find that it makes people feel more welcome, especially in our busy house, to have their own space. If you have the space I would encourage you to make a room for travelers, passer-byers, family, friends, and out of state coworkers. Having people stay in your home can be such a blessing as you serve them and teach your family to serve them. Do people know they can ask to stay with you?
The problem today is that hospitality has been a lost art. Most don't even practice it with friends, because they are too busy. Try to make time and you will be surprised how blessed you will be. Have fun with it!

Pictures are from our Cutco Christmas Party at our Home- a few are from years in the past at our old house!

Building A Thriving Marriage & A Thriving Business Part 2

2011-03-02T23:30:00.000-08:00

Dispelling Yet Another Lie

Lie#2: People who have successful businesses must have sacrificed their marriage & family life or compromised something, somewhere

Truth: Some may have. Some will and some do, and they will struggle in their personal life because of their decisions and actions (in the Bible its called sowing & reaping). However, that doesn't have to be you. I don't believe God would ever ask you to sacrifice your marriage or family for a business.

However, God designed all men to be providers and protectors. Their main instinct is to provide and protect you (their wife) and their babies. Some men were made to build businesses. For crying out loud, without them the rest of the world would be out of a job. Its just part of the contribution to this world God designed them personally for. The thing about building a business... is that it does take sacrifice. Sometimes it takes sacrifice of money. Sometimes it is sacrifice of time. Sometimes both. It depends on the nature of the business. To build any business you have to put in capital.
So as wives how should we view these sacrifices? I would propose a change of perspective; instead of viewing the hard work as a burden where there is sacrifice, view it as a "season" with an opportunity for growth. We all go through seasons in our lives where our time is required somewhere more than others. When you have a baby and you are getting up during the night for feedings... it's a season. Eventually that baby grows up and with proper training, they will sleep through the night. When you are starting a business, you are in a season of building that business. In that season, there will be sacrifice, but if you have the right perspective and are focused on helping your husband build it. Staying positive rather than burdening him with whining and complaining. The season can be a blessing to your marriage, not a burden.

One thing that really helped me to embrace that this was a season was that Isaac created vision with me as a partner. I was his number one team mate for life, I was his wife and he treated me with enough respect to include me in this endeavor. Together we made goals for our future and he would ask me, are you in then, are we going to pursue this goal? Then he gave me a clear picture of what to expect while we were "building" towards that goal. Our overall goal was, "if we work hard now we won't have to later." Building the business right meant training up leaders. Spending the time now to really focus on developing leaders so that the business doesn't "need" you to survive. This was a vision I could get behind! Now matter what kind of business you have... having a shared vision with boundaries and very realistic expectations is a key to success in building a stronger marriage, while building a business.

How do you keep positive when you husband is working such long hours?

When Isaac and I were engaged and building our District Portland Office we worked between 90-110 hours a week sometimes. We worked hard, but we were doing it together. It was a building season. That building season for us lasted a short 2 years. In the long scheme of life... what is 2 years? Two years to have developed leaders in the organization to be able to run the business and allow us to have more "balance." Within those two years though... I wasn't working in the office full time. After we got married, I got pregnant with our eldest daughter just 3 short months later. Being terribly ill with morning sickness, I couldn't finish school, much less work in the office. So I did what I could to help behind the scenes. I trained receptionists, paid business bills, took care of organization of the office, filled paperwork, and brought meals to Isaac at work. I began really taking care of my man. We had team meetings and team night out every Wednesday night. I would go and hang out with our team, bring homemade treats. I became kind of like the "team mom." Oh, how I loved my role. But don't get me wrong, it was hard... Isaac was still working long hours and there were many days where I was sick and in bed puking... wishing he were there with me. There were nights I ate dinner and went to bed alone because he was out of town at a meeting or conference and we couldn't afford for me to go with him. There were times I got frustrated and wished he would choose ME over the business. I wasn't all in. I thought, "Why can't he just get a job someplace else and work a normal schedule." None of my friend’s husbands worked like Isaac. They couldn't relate. Their husbands didn't travel all the time and work crazy hours. Before I knew it, I found myself getting into that ugly comparing cycle that trap women fall into. It's a trap from the enemy! That trap can destroy you, your marriage, and friendships. Steer clear from that trap ladies! You know what helped though. Doing what I could to help build the business, and take any burden off Isaac that I could to make his job go faster, easier, and be more productive. Then I focused on building my first business... my home and remembering that this was just a season.

Another aspect I have heard over the years is... "he must have sacrificed a lot to be that successful..." This does NOT have to be so. Yes we have made sacrifices in certain seasons, but we have not compromised our faith or what we felt called to do in this world. Isaac and I are believers in Jesus Christ and we believe He has created us for a purpose in this life, just as He has created you for a purpose. We have always felt honored that God has put us in a position of influence. Yes we worked hard to be were we are at today. Isaac working long hard hours, meant me working longer, hard hours as a mom & wife to a guy with a crazy work schedule. I remember making enchiladas at 10 pm at night for the staff as they were on their way over to our house for an "Emergency Meeting." And yes this happened more than once! :) But I loved it! I really did... I loved that it meant my husband could be home instead away at the office and we could invite these, at the time young college guys, into our home for a meal.
If God is calling you to the duty of being a business owner and you are a Christian, doing right by your people, loving them, really putting into their lives to help them grow personally is such a high calling. It is a priveledge given by God to be loving lights to them. This aspect of doing our best to have integrity and love the people God has provided us to work with has been a huge catalyst for growth in our marriage over the years. Integrating business life with our personal life has blessed our business and our marriage more than words can describe.

I hope this post is encouraging and that you will jion me again next week as I share more about how to integrate business life with personal life! Blessings to you all, your families, and your businesses!

Building A Thriving Marriage & A Thriving Business Part 1

2011-02-27T23:07:00.002-08:00

Dispelling the Myth

Today I want to dispel the first of a few myths that I believe hurt businesses and marriages.

Lie #1: You can't have it all- A Thriving Marriage & A Thriving Business
Truth: A thriving marriage can help create a thriving business! No, a thriving business doesn't create a thriving marriage.
The obvious tip here is to be focused on creating a strong foundation for your marriage from the beginning. Create a Vision and Mission for you and your spouse to have as your driving force. The thing you look back to that keeps you moving forward together. For Isaac and I, it was our Faith in Christ and belief that He had created us for a purpose and put us together for a purpose. We don't personally believe we were created to just live here and indulge our own selfish desires (although we do struggle with selfishness like everyone else). Rather, we believe we were put here on earth for a reason and we try to stay purposefully productive towards fulfilling the tasks and visions the Lord lays on our hearts.

For years, I have had a heart for young women who are married and starting a business with there husbands. My desire is to see their marriages thriving, not surviving. To see them as a couple find their "place" in this world where they are feeling confidant they are giving their highest contribution to the world.

Why would anyone settle for a "surviving" marriage? Statistically, if over 50% of marriages end in divorce ... how many of those 50% left are really in love? Choosing to Love? Enjoying being married? 50 years down the road how many of those 50 % that are still married... have thriving marriages... not just surviving... not just "stayed together because we know divorce is wrong” or "for the kids" or dare I say it..." divorce is unbiblical." While those are good reasons to not get a divorce shouldn't we have a higher standard? I have a higher standard for my marriage. I want a thriving marriage in 50 years. One that is still on purpose and building something significant together. Yes, one of our purposes is to raise our children in a strong Christ centered home, but after the kids are grown, what next? I know... I can't wait! I know there are so many things Isaac and I feel "called" to do... ways to serve in this world...giving our greatest contribution possible with what we have been given. My prayer is that you have that standard as well!
Dream! Take Action! Having a marriage on Purpose doesn't just happen, it takes making a choice and staying committed to working at it. So build a strong foundation with a conviction for your future together. Build Your Marriage on a Solid Foundation.
When you build your Marriage strong with Vision and a Future in Mind then you can Begin Building a strong business together... even if you aren't "working together" all day. I only officially worked with Isaac and the Portland Office for a few months after we got married. I was still in University and then we had also found out we were going to be parents, so it became harder for me to work. But even though we weren't together all day, every day like we were those first 9 months the office was open, I was still helping him build our business, our future, our livelihood. It just looked different.
A huge key for being able to build a business together without being together at the office all day is to try to find ways to integrate your business life into your personal life. This takes intentionality on your part. You have to figure it out and plan to do it. Our world, society, tells us separation of work from family life is called living a “balanced” life. I personally don’t believe in that form of balance. I actually believe it is a lie satan has used to get believers to close off their lives from the world that we are called to be lights too. You can be purposeful and share the gospel with someone at work, if your work allows it. But didn’t Jesus go and meet people’s needs while he preached. What needs do your co workers have? Do you even know them? Does your wife know them? How can your marriage & family be ambassadors for Christ? How can you use your home, possessions, and time as embassies for the Kingdom of God? You see, by separating work life from personal, the main place God has placed you becomes under utilized.
For us, hospitality quickly became a huge part of my ministry to my husband's work, which hugely helped build and develop leaders. It enabled Isaac to really spend the time he needed with these young guys to help them learn and grow in the business so they could build a business of their own. In having these young guys in our home for dinners, bbqs, and just over anytime (I mean late nights I was up making enchiladas some times at like 10 pm). I was helping Isaac build our business. Having people into our home gave me the opportunity to keep learning about the growth & knowledge of the business and stay connected... keep up with the jive talk of the business. It also helped me feel like Isaac and I were a team, and like I was helping him, which is part of what built our marriage stronger. Aside from all of that I also felt a high calling to be purposefully loving these young people Isaac worked with and to model a strong marriage for them since so many came from broken homes and didn't believe in marriage. It has been such a HUGE blessing and privilege to watch some of these young people grow into such fine, mature, strong men and women. Serving them through counseling, providing a good home cooked meal (which was sometimes so huge for these college guys), letting them stay over when they came from out of town, and so many other ways became another huge part of what built up our marriage.
I realize not every business allows for the same kind of ministry opportunities Isaac and I have been so blessed to have experienced within our business... however, I would encourage you too look for and ask your spouse how can we integrate the business into our personal life more? I really don't believe God ever intended for our personal life to be separate from our work life. It's all our Life and it doesn't even technically belong to us when we are living for Christ. Why not share the beauty of what God is doing in your marriage and family with those who don't know Him or might need the love of a family. That's really what we are called to do. Love our neighbors... our neighbors are our co-workers, employees, employers, etc.

Thriving Marriage & Thriving Businesses Series

2011-02-26T09:33:00.000-08:00

I am excited to start this series which I am calling"Building Thriving Marriages & Thriving Businesses"
As many of you know, my husband has worked for Cutco for 16 years. That was how we meet. I worked for the company first as a sales rep and then after training to run my own office, Isaac and I were engaged so my focus changed and I became his main Assistant Manager. Together we built our first year round District Office.
Isaac and I really enjoyed building together! I will share more of our story in the first series post.

Over the years, we have seen many businesses thrive at the expense a marriage. We have also seen many businesses close down to save a marriage. We have also seen marriages and businesses get "stuck" in a stagnate place, where there is no growth = which equals, not much happiness. Running your own business is hard work, which requires sacrifice in certain seasons. We have had this experience first hand. Nothing worth having comes easy, including a strong marriage. You have to choose to work at it!
Now, running your own business is not for everyone. I believe God is the perfect Creator/ Designer, and He has made everyone unique. We are not all "made" to be business owners. This series set is for those who are running businesses or thinking of doing it. I hope that I can share what I have experienced and observed over the years to encourage you and your business & marriage.

Come join me, starting Monday Feb 28!

Pick Pocket Molly

2011-02-18T21:38:00.000-08:00

Are you into REUSEING, REDUCING, & RESALE

If so, then a Pick Pocket Molly Event is for You!
Come join us for the first event April 1-3!

What is this event???
Have you heard of a Pass it on Sale for Kids clothing???
Pick Pocket Molly is a similar event, but for us moms- well all women!
Pick Pocket Molly is a fun way for women to resell their clothing for a good price and find good deals shopping! Lets face it, as Moms, we don't have a ton of time to put into shopping... but if you sign up as a consignor you can sell some of your old duds, clean out your closet, and make some cash to fund buying new clothes!
If you have a hard time getting out you can shop online as well
here

What can you sell???
Women's Clothes (Maternity as well), Coats, Shoes, Jewelry, Purses, Belts, Hats, and all kinds of other Accessories!
They are also featuring Lamps this Month!
To Sign up as a Consignor go here

If you don't want to get money for your clothes you can also "donate" them.

Pick Pocket Molly Donates to Women's Ministries:
5% to Bethany House
5% to Rapha House in Southeast Asia
to find out more go here

I am very excited to share with you this awesome event, which my very good friend
Alice Behnke has created with her husband Chris Behnke. Alice has style and has a standard for modesty, which I also love.
Yes, You can be dressed modest and still look cute!

After all I want my husband to love the way I dress...
I don't dress for the world ... I dress first for my Lord (modestly)... and next for my husband! This is a great way to mix up our closets without having to shop all over town, make some money, and get rid of some of the clothes we outgrew after having six babies (lol), like me!

Hope to see you at the event!

Visit the Pick Pocket Molly website:
www.pickpocketmolly.com

Living on a Mission

2010-12-30T22:21:00.000-08:00

Every year people make New Year's Resolutions.
I've made them in the past and I am sure you've probably made them as well.
Two years ago I got on a mission about not making New Year's Resolution's but reflecting on my life and being honest. Truly honest... about my relationships, physical health, spiritual life, marriage, parenting, nutritional habits, financial goals. Some areas were more encouraging and exciting to evaluate than others of course, but so healthy to take time and reflect.
Since we were married, eleven years ago Isaac and I have enjoyed brainstorming sessions twice a year... maybe more... once on our anniversary and once around New Years. We have gone back and forth over the years with having a mission statement for our family/marriage and then goals & actions steps for accomplishing those goals in the different areas of life (marriage, spiritual, family, education, financial, business, etc...). It is stimulating for our marriage to be "building" something together and I can not tell you how helpful it for me mentally and being able to support my husband in his businesses and vision for our life and family. I feel like we are a team and I feel more "on mission or on purpose" with our ideas, dreams and goals laid out. Its a chance for us to share our hearts with each other and support one another in prayer. Its also so fun to look back on previous years goals and see God's faithfulness in our lives.
So this year I have been anticipating this time with Isaac. I recently came across this awesome help for accomplishing what we normally do, but in a more organized manner. (For any of you who know me well, you know how much I LOVE organizing things.) Ann Dunagan @ Harvest Ministry is offering a FREE 2011 New Year's Guide! Two things I really like the most... (1) The focus of being Mission-Minded (Great Commission) as you are evaluating your life... this is a different aspect I am personally excited to focus more on! (2) She has thought provoking questions and an evaluation chart to fill out as you reflect upon the previous year.

I am excited to hear what you New Year Goals are for 2011! Please share and leave me a comment!

Funny Faces

2010-12-26T07:53:00.001-08:00

The pictures speak for themselves!

Merry Christmas!

2010-12-25T01:42:00.000-08:00

May you day be filled with love & special memories be made!
May Jesus be Glorified and Praised in your Homes and Hearts today!

"She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins." Matthew 1:21
Merry Christmas!
From the Tolpin Family

December Home School...

2010-12-20T10:15:00.000-08:00

December at the Tolpins

Many people have been asking me what we do for home school the month of December...
A typical December at our house looks like this:
We take the month off from most "typical school subjects" to learn more about Jesus, focus on Jesus, celebrate Jesus, and bless family and friends through hospitality & special gift making.

I am a CRAFT ADDICT... I love doing hands on activities with the kids so here are some
Gift Making for Kids...
Here are a few ideas of things we have done this year...
If your family sorry if you see your gift before Christmas...
but so many friends have been asking for ideas...

Painting Terra Cotta Flower pots for those garden enthusiasts in the family! Ceramic Coasters from the ceramic cafe... each kid paints one! So much fun!Drew made ceramic magnets! Mix, bake, paint!
Megan painted a glass picture frame~

The big kids embroidered towels! Yep even boys need to know how to sew!
Little ones Painting Wooden treasures from Craft store!

Babies helped me make special memories plaques!

Drew made Luke a yellow ducky for Christmas! All the kids enjoyed candle making & soap making~

Other gift ideas we have made successfully:
~Harvesting herbs and giving them in beautiful green glass bottles bought from Mountain Rose Herb Store. Lavender, Chamomile, Rosemary, Dill, Thyme, Oregano & Peppermint are our favorites for cooking and teas!
~Making bracelets, key chains out of bottle caps
~ Magnet making
~Making Coasters with Modge Podge
~Photo crafts such as calenders, mouse pads, mugs, ornaments, magnets,etc...
~Making cement mosaic stepping stones
~knitting scarves
~pot holder loom kit
~tie-knot blankets
~sewing baby doll blankets
~cookie, muffin, soup mixes in a jar- we have been making these for years for neighbors... since before I had kids and people LOVE them
~Cookies in a tin can of course!
~ Canvas painting for Grandparents
~Potpourri Sachets

Many ideas come from just walking through the craft store. So when all else fails I go there and walk around to get ideas. Some great websites for activities if you don't want to put the craft supplies together.... Creativity for Kids & of course Timberdoodle has boxed craft ideas too!

May you, as a mother embrace the time you have with your kids and enjoy them as you create together...

Getting Ready for NorPac Christmas Party

2010-12-20T09:53:00.001-08:00

Last friday was our annual NorPac Christmas Party! We started out the day finishing making dessert & appetizers! Here are the boys helping us make some choco crunch treats & almond bark... super fast easy and yummy treat for little ones to help with!

Choco Crunch Treats:
equal parts milk chocolate chips & butterscotch chips- melted...
stir in crunchy chow mein noodles and drop on wax paper to harden!

Almond Bark:
Roast Almonds... melt chocolate chips over med low heat.... spread almonds out on cookie sheet and pour chocolate over top... let it harden then break into pieces...so good! Thanks Keziah for showing us how to make the bark!

Other desserts & appetizers we made for party:
Christmas cookies... Mint fudge... Fondue Fountain... deviled eggs (my fav)... famous meatballs...
cheese plater... and more! Thanks to All that Jazz Catering I didn't have to cook dinner this year! What a nice break! The food was awesome... and so nice to not have to do it all!

Productive Play

2010-12-01T22:58:00.000-08:00

Toys for Birthdays, Toys for Christmas,

Toys for Education???

After being at the local toy store and being over whelmed by the quantity of junk they call toys as well as the lack of quality toys I have decided to awaken my blog from a deep sleep.

Toys, there are many different ideas and theories out there about them. In sharing some I have encountered, you may be surprised. Hopefully challenged and led to think deeply about what toys you are purchasing this holiday season!

When I first got married, I thought, we wouldn't "waste" money on toys! Have you ever thought that? Wow have we come a long way! Then as my daughter got older, I was introduced to the idea that "a child's play is their work." Wanting to "invest" in their education and keep the children stimulated I decided to try to purchase and encourage family members to give gifts that were proper play that would also educate.

Then as the family grew larger and the amount of toys grew larger, I wanted to simplify... so we buckled down and donated massive quantities of toys. It felt so good! And it forced me to have to start putting tools in my children's hands more often, rather than just toys. We're taking about a broom rather than a buzz lighter year action figure!

I have heard older women give talks on this topic, some even encouraging to not have any toys at all, rather have tools appropriate for children to use. Help them to contribute, be productive! Now, do my kids have toys? Oh yes they do! But the toys are a reward to be played with when their work is done.

Most of our toys (most of them) have purposes. I feel like I am constantly weeding out toys that seem to have no point-- as you know it could be a full time job. The kids are aware of their purposes. For example, stuffed animals... recently I heard a talk given on this topic of dolls vs. stuffed animals... I thought it was so insightful I want to share it with you.

In our current society there is a huge push for a humanistic view of animals. People view their dogs and cats as their children in some cases. Now, let me just say if I offend you here I am sorry... but dogs and cats aren't human. They are dogs and cats, not babies. We have a dog, we love Moses, but he is a dog. So lets relate stuffed animals to dolls in the same sense we do dogs to babies. Are they ok for kids to play with, for sure, but as a dog. If a child's play is their work, I believe it is also an element of education. I propose a child's every day play trains them for their every day life as an adult. If they play with stuffed animals as people, then there is a chance they will have a humanistic world view when they are older. If a little girl plays with a dolly, she is practicing being a mommy. If she plays "house," she is praticing being a home maker. If a boy starts making guns out of his legos its because God created little boys to grow into men who have an innate desire to protect and provide for a family; which is also a good thing.

So let me encourage you, as the holiday shopping begins, pray about what gifts you buy your children and other peoples children. Be purposeful and think about what the toy is really going to teach them. Is it going to teach them productive play or will it end up in next years donation box? I have been down this road enough times to know how easy it is to make mistakes in gift buying.

Here are a few websites to help you out:

Plus online shopping is so much faster and easier!

Keepers of the Faith-- this is a new company I just discovered and LOVE it- go here first

These are the main companies we like to support and enjoy being blessed by the products they sell.

What is Marriage For?

2010-11-09T22:36:00.000-08:00

Please come join us to hear speaker Gregg Harris on the topic
"What is Marriage For?"

This Thursday, November 11 @ 6:30pm
Where: Persimmon Country Club
Sponsored Event~ Includes Free Dinner

RSVP here

We Have a Winner!

2010-11-01T23:21:00.000-07:00

We have a winner of the AIO Diaper Challenge!

Tonya!
Hope you like these as much as I do!

Sorry I haven't been blogging much lately... it takes a while for a bug to go through a family of eight! Still working on getting well so will be out for a few days!

I would like to encourage those moms who can to go to the next Above Rubies Retreat this coming Saturday though.
Go here for info:
www.aboverubies.org

Nancy is speaking about the tactics Satan used to stop Ezra and Nehemiah from building the temple and the gates of Jerusalem, and how he uses these same tactics today to stop us in our great building program of building godly marriages and families. I hope we are all well by then so I can go!

AIO Cloth Diaper Contest

2010-10-22T21:43:00.000-07:00

The AIO Cloth Diaper Challenge
Join the Cloth Diaper Challenge by leaving me a comment at the end of this post!
At the end of Next Week we will have a drawing!

After trying cloth diaper services with the first few babes and investing in prefolds and wraps with the 3rd... I finally decided to try the AIO (All In One) Diaper. I had used Fuzzy Bunz in the past a really liked them but the ones I had were not adjustable in size so you had to "invest" in all the sizes and store the diapers, etc... It seemed like a hassle in the long run. So I checked online during this pregnancy and to my surprise there they were... the All In One Cloth Diapers.

Unfortunately I got disenchanted when I began to realize that there were dozens of different companies out there selling all Size fits all diapers now and they all say they have the best diaper. I didn't have the money or the desire to try them all, but I did try a few and here is my choice picks for cloth diapers.

Runner Up is the Envibum Diaper...
made locally in Vancouver, Washington by a fellow Mommie!
Benefits:
one Size fits all, easy to wash (doesn't seem to stain), you can through in dryer,
made of unbleached cotton & plush Minkee... great added bonus: they have a fab guarantee!
You can try out there diaper (1) and if you don't like it send it back with your entire order for a reimbursement! Another cool thing about this company is they give $2 back to a different company based upon the color of diaper you choose! So for example... green diapers give $2 to Food for the Hungry & pink gives $2 to the Pregnancy Resource Center & so on... a different charity for each diaper-- I think that is makes it worth buying the diapers!
They also have a fabulous waterproof diaper that I have used in pools! Works great! Check them out at Envibum.com

Down side... A bit bulky on newborns (not my favorite fit); however they absorb a TON & they keep the moisture and poo off the baby's bum! Another downside is the cost... they are a bit spendy (compared to my #1 pick for diapers)
But not as expensive as most out there on the market
$21.99 per diaper
with discounts for packs

First Place: Favorite Diaper!
Kawaii Diapers
find them at LuvYourBabyCute Designs- cheap price $8.95 each
more luxurious ones 10.95 each
super fast service- received my order in a week!

And sooo many more designs! Go check them out!

Make Sure you leave a comment so I can enter you in a drawing for a free Kawaii Diaper compliments of LuvYourBaby.com

Benefits include:
Easy to Wash- No staining...
Good Price... Fits so well on newborns and toddlers
Buy with Velcro or snaps... I prefer snaps (I think they will last longer)
Come with cotton microfiber inserts that absorb a lot!
Plush Minkee Outer Shell w/Micro Fleece Inner: super soft and comfy for baby!
Very Easy to Use and Wash! They are Designer too!

New Eco Friendly! Minkee Bamboo Diaper are thinner and comfier... they are $10.50 ea
These are really nice too... we have tried out 3!
The Minkee Bamboo diapers come in cute solid colors like these:

Thanks for stopping by and saying hi!
Next Saturday I will announce the winner of the AIO Challenge!

Waterbirth: Why I love it!

2010-10-19T19:22:00.000-07:00

I am a HUGE advocate for water birth!
After having 6 babies- 3 under water, my opinion is that if you can, it is the way to go. That is if you like water of course!
Why???
A few reasons, I believe, are that when you are in water, you are gravity free in a way. I have found when having back labor the weight of the baby can float off the spine making contractions easier to bare. Water is relaxing for most people and helps with dealing with the intensity of birth. Another reason is that I think that being in water for a long time during labor helps the perineum stay intact. I have never had a tear or rip with a water birth and all 3 babies were over 8.5 pounds, including my 9.9lb posterior birth.
I did however rip on 2 of the births that were out of the water!
You see why I like water birth!
Another benefit of the water is that it is seemingly a more gentle transition for the baby... being birthed from amniotic fluid to warm water, rather than from a cozy amnio sac into the hands of a stranger wearing gloves with bright lights glaring in their face.
I have seen awesome water birth videos where the baby is born in a river and allowed to swim around before they detach the baby from the umbilical cord. They have an instinct and can still get oxygen from the cord... they don't take their first breathe until they come up out of the water. Pretty Cool!
If you are considering waterbirth, you can get supplies from Radiant Belly a local midwifery supplier here in Portland with great prices. The owner was one of my midwives with my 5th baby and a great lady.
I would also highly recommend Andaluz Waterbirth Center. They have 2 locations, one in Portland and one in Tualatin. I have birthed in both locations and have no preference, they are both great locations, close to hospitals, in case of an emergency.

Responsive Breastfeeding & Fertility

2010-10-16T09:52:00.001-07:00

Over the past 11 years I have read many on Breastfeeding & Fertility Signs in attempts to have a good split between being pregnant to give myself a break to recover from the tough pregnancies with nausea, vomiting, back issues and then nursing. Out of the numerous books that cover this issue, these two books are the two I have found most profound & would recommend to any first time mom as well as seasoned mother.

"Fertility Signs:

Using Them to Achieve or Avoid Pregnancy Naturally"

by Merryl Winstein

$13.45 on Amazon

Brief Overview:

This book is not a Christian book- disclaimer

It is very educational though... how our bodies work, explaining cycles & signals. How to read your fertility signs; the mucus signal, basal temperature signal, and your energy/mood signals. The book teaches on how stress effects ovulation, menopause, infertility and more.

I think every woman should read this book to understand more about how our creator made our bodies and how to read them. Understanding your sexual organs & fertility signals and how they function is key to family planning and understanding our own woman's health. This book can be empowering for women. If you have thyroid issues (which makes your basal temperature hard to chart) and are nursing with no "signals" I have not found any way of telling when or if you are ovulating. According to the following book I suggest... if you allow the baby to suckle enough your body will secrete enough progesterone that you won't ovulate. So just keep nursing with no supplements to prevent conception.

"Breastfeeding & Fertility"

by Jenny Silliman

$10 @ Above Rubies Bookstore

I just came across this book this summer and finished when Ethan was about 3 weeks old. What an encouragement for a mother no matter how many children she has.

This is a Christian author who encourages women as they give their fertility to the Lord, whether for a season or their lifetime.

The method she encourages is called Responsive Breastfeeding, which is similar to On Demand Feeding and opposes schedule feeding (known primarily from the book "Baby Wise").

As I read this book it really spoke to my heart bc I related to it as I have mainly "demand fed" most of my children. For me it was instinctual to demand feed. I tried to do the "Baby Wise" program that was so encouraged by women in the Christian community, but it broke my heart to let a baby cry and nearly hyperventilate all in the name of "training them to a schedule." I know many women who have done baby wise and their babies thrived! But for my household, it didn't feel right. I am a fairly schedule oriented person, generally speaking... we eat around the same time everyday for every meal... my kids take naps the same time every day... and yes even demand feeding allows you to get on some kind of regular schedule with naps. All my kids are "religious" with their naps and have always been. It is a "sacred" time for mommy as well. We all need a little quiet time/ rest time/ nap time!

This book made me feel more confident in following my instincts when it comes to mothering a newborn. You could label me a closet responsive breast feeder. While many moms I knew where doing baby wise, I was demand feeding through the night, through out the day. Yes, I was tired, but my milk would let down just before the baby awoke so it seemed natural to feed them. My body was in sinc with my baby and I didn't like the idea of a baby crying for hours, which would mean no sleep for mama anyway.

For a simple book review, Jenny encourages responsive (demand) breastfeeding in order to prevent ovulation. Now I know what you are thinking, Angie you are a perfect example of how breastfeeding isn't good birth control. However, I am actually the perfect example. In this book, Jenny says that the main difference between responsive breastfeeding and demand is that you don't just feed the baby whenever they cry, you know your baby and study your baby's cries and then soothe them by massage, diaper changing, burping, attention, cuddling, and nursing. However, you do not supplement the nipple with anything else...ever. No pacifiers, no bottles, no rice cereal before teeth.

Letting the baby suck even for comfort when there tummy hurts or if they are teething is good because every time the baby nurses it releases the hormone progesterone which prevents ovulation. Premature ovulation can occur when the baby is not suckling enough. This happened to me only once. With my second I tried using the Baby Wise schedule, the idea of having them sleep through the night early was so tempting. So I succumbed and gave Austin a pacifier and he slept through the night. Subsequently, I got pregnant with Megan just before Austin turned 9 months old, so they are 18 months apart. Austin was the only one of our children who had a pacifier and we weaned him at 16 months before baby sister came along. That was a challenge. Of all my children he is the only one who grinds his teeth , which he learned from biting and chewing on the pacifier. He is also the only one so far with an under bite (I don't know if the 2 are related...the orthodontist says probably so). In addition he was my most emotionally needy child...I believe because I failed to responsive breastfeed. I put him on a schedule, supplemented formula at night to get him to sleep, and gave him a pacifier. I have had to deal with the remorse of failing him in that way. I have also had to be very purposeful about building his self esteem over the years because he seemed less confident and timid. He is becoming such a confident, strong young boy now, but it has been years of purposefully trying to build up his self esteem.

We tried a pacifier with Megan, but she only took it for a couple weeks. I had decided I didn't want to go down that same road as Austin. Megan and Drew are 20 months apart and that is probably also because I had to wean her at 11 months old so I could have an urgent surgery. Austin and Kelsey are 33 months apart, Drew and Luke are 25 months apart, and Luke and Ethan are 25 months apart which is all really good spacing. When I read this book it made so much sense because my personal experience fit perfectly with all I read.

Now I understand that many women have many different experiences, after all God has a different journey for each of us. My personal story is just one that is completely free from hormones. I have not taken any birth control other than for a month at the beginning of my marriage. When I immediately had side effects I went off, and God started our family. Since then I have learned about the dangers of Birth Control. My favorite resource on this topic is:

This is $3.00 @ Eternal Perspective Ministries

2 Months Already!

2010-10-16T09:46:00.001-07:00

Ethan at 2 Months Old!

Dimples & Smiles

Household Embassy Banquet

2010-10-12T22:00:00.000-07:00

Come Join Isaac and I at the 3rd Household Embassy Banquet!
Thursday, Oct 14th @ 6:30-8:30pm

Dinners have been sponsored, so please come enjoy a great night with an equipping message on applicable ways to use our households as embassies for Christ Kingdom on Earth.

This month's message on...
"Furthering Your Embassy-Impact Through Progress"

Please RSVP at the Household Embassy Website!
http://www.householdembassy.org

What is the Household Embassy Movement from Chris Behnke on Vimeo.

What's the Mission...
Trust Jesus enough to actually obey Him.
Live intentionally as ambassadors for Christ.
Use our household as an embassy of Christ's kingdom on earth.
Encourage others to do likewise.
Unite the Larger body of Christ, empowering believers to go back to their churches stronger in order to spread a revival of purposefulness in reaching out.

Postpartum Helps & Living Real

2010-10-10T13:02:00.000-07:00

Healthy Foods that Help PostPartum:

Eggs & Avocado: High in Serotonin

Kelp/Seaweed/Dulce- Good for thyroid- very vulnerable postpartum

St. John Wart- Herb/Tincture

Sepia 30c- Homeopathy for Mood Swings(when your critical & snappy)

Natrum mur 30c-homeopathy for weepiness

Pulsatilla 30c- Homeopathy for women desiring sympathy and company

Platina 30c- Disappointed in everyone and seems aloof, also she feels like shes alone in the world, weepy

Cimicifuga 30c- Feels like she's in a black cloud

Anacardium 30c- Better while eating , but sad again soon after. Deep loss of confidence. easily angered and given to hatred. Failing memory.

For a guide on using Homeopathy... I would suggest:

"Homeopathy: An A to Z Home Handbook"
by Alan Schmukler

For a free copy online goggle him and go to first link.

After having five babies and never really experiencing postpartum depression or anxiety the way it is described, I used to think that it wasn't real and it was some woman's made up excuse for being mean, weepy, and full of worry ( along with a whole gamut of other emotions and challenges). I actually believed that if women were stronger with the Lord they could have self control over their thoughts, feelings, emotions, etc...

Well, after having Ethan I experienced the fears, the anxiety, the weepiness, the lack of control. Now that I am on the healing end of things, my heart has been convicted of how judgemental I was. I really never believed postpartum blues or depression was real. Now I have to admit that through out the time I was struggling I went in and out of being the Word of God. When I came home I was ill... trying to recover from my massive postpartum hemorrhage, which knocked me off my feet, I couldn't take care of my family or home. That depressed me. I couldn't stand hearing the boys arguing in the other room and being able to get up and help them. I really stressed out when the kids would get hurt, thinking if I was better that they wouldn't have gotten hurt. I felt like I was expecting too much from my older children because they were having to do sooo much more around the house, rather than just being kids. I didn't have thank fullness in my heart for the help God had provided in Keziah and Kirsten. Instead , needing their help made me feel less of a mom. All these thoughts contributed to me struggling with anxiety, stress, worry, and anger even.
I don't know where I would be today if I didn't have the Lord Jesus and the encouragement from my mom, and other christian mentors in my life reminding me this was just a season and that I was a good mom. I had such low self esteem and I allowed that to make me angry. I found myself apologizing all the time for my bad attitude, my whining, my crying, and yelling.
Wow, I am so glad we are out of that season! I am sure my husband & kids are as well.

What I learned from this?
That postpartum blues/ depression is real. That it is spiritual as well as hormonal and chemical. It is real and women who have it need other women in their life helping them. I pray for the moms I know that are having babies soon... pray for them for this tough season. I did enjoy Ethan tremendously, it was just overwhelming for a few weeks. Only the Lord and His Word can help you to see your own sin in a season like this.
Mark Hamby once said in one of his "Transforming Seminars" (by lamplighter), "I have seen a lot of people in pain and dying and they have a joyful attitude." Our true self can be revealed, our sin, selfishness, struggle with giving up control, what ever it is...
When I heard this is motivated me...
I realized I wasn't being the person I was meant to be in Christ. I needed Him to be my strength. I needed to give him the control. I needed Jesus to refresh the atmosphere of my home. I feel as though we are getting back on track, finally. Although not completely... home schooling is not in full force, but we will get there eventually. The Lord is teaching us all something through the process. Having people praying for me and being open and honest about my struggles allowed my brothers & sisters in Christ to be praying for me specifically. It was very humbling for me to show my weaknesses and be real. But that is what God wants from us. How else can the Body of Christ function the way it is meant to. We are supposed to carry each others burdens as well as lay them at the cross. How can the church do that when we are all putting on masks and pretending everything is okay? The reality is that even with Christ we still experience struggles in this life, we are not perfect because we are Christians! We are imperfect and fully aware of it, we are just able to receive God's grace and live in Joy & Freedom!

I hope if you are struggling with postpartum or have friends that are this gives you a little insight into what they might be dealing with. Let us lift one another up in prayer. We are all humans made by the same creator trying to live our best life here. Lets Love one another. We were created for love.

Kelsey's 10th Party

2010-10-07T15:44:00.000-07:00

Kelsey finally celebrated her 10th birthday with some friends at Ceramic Cafe!

Thanks to all the girls for coming!

After Birth Care Products

2010-10-07T14:14:00.000-07:00

Sitz Bath Iced Packs
First make the sitz bath herbs like you do tea... french press work the best with this bulk tea... but we boiled the tea...strained it with cheese cloth...then stored & poured from a mason jar.

Then you pour sitz bath into pads and freeze.

How to use a Sitz Bath:
Make a concentrated amount of the sitz bath tea, pour in tub hot and add water to tub until the desired depth. The more water you add the less concentrated the herbs obviously, so remember you want the bath to be as strong as possible for effectiveness.
You can also order sitz baths to use on your toilet so you dont have take a bath.
You can buy them online at Cascade Health Care located in Portland... heads up though... you can not purchase anything by dropping in on them, order only. Visit them at 1Cascade.com

Sitz Bath Herbs
are a great way to help with quick healing after childbirth!

After Birth Sitz bath
I learned a trick from my midwives...
soak the afterbirth pads in sitz bath and freeze...
then wear to bring down inflammation down prevent hemorrhoids.

Another way to prevent hemorrhoids during pregnancy and after birth...
www.wishgardenherbs.com sells bummeroid cream... it works great!

Austin's Baptism

2010-10-05T22:02:00.000-07:00

Our Son Austin was baptized on Saturday, October 2, 2010!
The 2 ceremonies (ordinances) Christ commanded his church to perform are baptism and the Lord's Supper.
Baptism symbolizes dying and rising with Christ and having sins washed away

(Rom. 6:1-12). "What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? BY no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? Or don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life...For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin- because anyone who has died has been freed from sin... The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. .. Therefore do not let sin reign your in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires."

Mark 16:16
Jesus said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned."

Matthew 28:19-2-0
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you."

Many christian parents are very intentional about "making sure their children are baptized." Some at infancy, some at an age of accountability, and others at the time that the child is ready. All of which are personally inspired or prompted by the Lord and or based upon their personal beliefs and interpretation of the scriptures on this topic. My concern for parents today is that they do not take the later half of this scripture to heart as deeply... seeing the significance in what our Lord Jesus is commanding us to do. He said, "GO" but he also said, "teach them to obey everything I have commanded you."

I am so ever thankful to the Lord for the miraculous thing he has done in my son's heart. I am thankful that he desired to "obey" the Lord in being baptized. I am thankful for so many things!
Jesus was tempted by Satan following his baptism and as Christians we all understand how temptation works and how we are constantly fighting our flesh and the sins of this world. Please keep my son Austin in your prayers, that this would be a rich season in his life of growing deeper with the Lord, understanding his word, and gaining His wisdom. I urge to also be praying for Isaac and I to stay the course and focus now on the later part of Matt 28- teaching Austin to obey all that He has commanded.

If you are looking for useful guides in teaching your children about baptism here are a few we have found to be helpful:
The Bible
Wayne Grudem's Systematic Theology
Baptism- "A Bible Study Workbook for Kids" by Richard Todd- This is a small activity book with verses

If you have any other good helps... please leave them in the comment box for others to glean from

Bulk Herb Store

2010-09-30T22:05:00.000-07:00

The Bulk Herb Store

Our dear friend and trusted helper, Keziah, introduced me to the Bulk Herb Store.
When she first starting coming over, she brought with her this absolutely great salve called the Eden Salve. After about a month, I realized I need to invest in some of our own. I found every time the kids had a tumble, cut, scrap, or bump we were "using hers up."
So I finally gave in and went to their website a month ago and I am hooked.

This is Shoshanna Pearl's (maiden name) online herb store.
She has awesome how to dvd's on making your own poultices, salves, how to cultivate & identify, grow, and harvest herbs, and so much more. I have watched the Volume 1 and highly recommend it as well as the Herbal books written by Hoffmann which are sold on her website as well. I have tried 4 of their teas... very herbal... warning they are strong, but they work!

Eden Salve Ingredients: Echinacea root, comfrey leaf, proplois, plantain leaf, echinacea purpurea, yarrow flower, rosemary leaf, beeswax, pure olive oil and grapefruit seed extract.
All natural and it works for everything! We have put it on itchy bug bites (works awesome for the itch), diaper rash, circumcision, scraps, hangnails, chapped lips even!
I use it for everything and the best part is it is one medicine for all ailments. You don't need all these tubes for different injuries or ailments.
It also lasts for a very long time...

Kelsey's Kale Scramble

2010-09-30T21:48:00.000-07:00

While Kelsey can not take all the credit for these eggs because sooo (my postpartum nurse-midwife, Isaac, Keziah & Kelsey) many blessed people have served me in making these eggs...

I am so thankful to her for all the dozens of mornings she has made these for me and with different variations. They are delicious as well as nutritious...

A MUST TRY!

Kelsey's Kale Scramble
Ingredients:
Eggs, chopped kale, diced onion, kelp & salt mixture, pepper, diced tomatoes, & diced bacon or diced Italian sausage.

How to prepare:
Prep all your ingredients, saute onions & meat. When meat is about done, add whisked eggs, add salt & pepper to taste. Stir the eggs to make them scrambled for about 1.5 minutes, then add kale and tomatoes. Serve with fry bread or English muffins!
Delicious and Nutritious!

Postpartum Hemorrage

2010-09-30T08:09:00.000-07:00

As I shared this birth was such an awesome experience. God was so clearly present and in control. There was a peace in the room that can only come from His presence. Now I want to share with you about a new experience I have been learning from. I experienced my first postpartum hemorrhage.
After Ethan was born, it took about 45 minutes for my placenta to detach and be birthed. Shortly after that I began to hemorrhage. We are not certain what prompted the hemorrhage, although we have our suspicions. For one thing I remained in the tub for a long time, rather than getting out... warmth of water may have triggered it, although that seems unlikely to me. The more likely culprit was no strong massage right after birth of placenta since I was still in the tub. Contrary to what many books say, I was not anemic. I had a hemoglobin level of around 14.4 throughout most of my pregnancy. I normally operate at a high level. To give you an idea of how much blood I lost; a week later my blood levels tested at 8.1... so I am certain I was in the 7s or lower directly after birth. What ever it was... it was low. The hospitals give transfusions in the 7s since a reading of 10 is considered anemic. If I would have been at the hospital I know they would have intervened and given me a transfusion, which has its own set of complications.

I don't remember much about the three hours after the placenta was birthed. It felt like 10 minutes to me. Apparently, I never lost consciousness, although I don't remember much. I remember my vision going in and out, losing eye sight in one eye completely (blacked out), feeling dizzy and sick to my stomach, but most of my focus was on the intense contractions or after birth cramps that were helping me birth huge clots. I know this is grouse, sorry. I just feel as though I wasn't prepared for this b/c most of the books I had read usually mention postpartum hemorrhage as being an issue if you are anemic, so I never was concerned. I am sharing so that people are aware that this can happen to anyone at any point. My midwives both assured me it was very random and that they see these kind of hemorrhages 20% of the time.

After I came home, things were a lot harder than I expected. And I have really struggled at times with this. I will share on this in a different post. I continued to have intense after birth cramps even though my uterus was back down and firm. The next weekend I ended up going to the hospital bc one lasted 38 minutes long and I had a fever. The did exams, ultrasounds, and blood work and wanted to give me antibiotics for the few clots that were still there, but my midwives convinced them they would work themselves out on there own and they sent me home. Relieved I didn't have a membrane from the placentas caught up in my uterus (that causes infection), we went home. A few hours later I did pass a big 1/4 cup clot. Aside from the cramps and clots, I was dizzy every time I stood up and my feet would swell if I sat up in a chair or stood for longer than five minutes. This was clearly going to be a longer recovery. =(

Here were some of my questions- My hope is that this can be educational for those of us still in our birthing years.

Does a postpartum hemorrhage mean you will stay anemic?
Not at all! Even though my blood levels were reading low... it doesn't mean I will be anemic in the future. Not even for future births, if we are blessed with more. All it means is that I will have to continue the iron supplements and treatment my midwives suggested until my blood levels are back to my normal. My midwives have been at births with mothers who had a bad hemorrhage and then went on to barely bleed at all after another baby. It really is that random.
I just need to work on building red blood cells back.

Do I regret having had the baby at the birth center rather than at home or at the hospital?

This was the right decision for us, for this pregnancy. There are those who only have hospital births and always plan on getting an epidural because "why would you experience pain when you don't have to?" Then on the far other extreme are those who think you are more "spiritual" if you only have home births... There are clearly two ditches on either side of the fence. There are many with a healthy balanced view of the benefits of natural birth, even home birth, but are not out to stand judging those who do not. I personally land on the fence... the median. I don't think it is our right to judge anyone either way. I have had both hospital births, and water center births... no home births yet. However, I have experienced God at all of them.
My prayer is that more people in the Christian Community would begin striving for the middle ground. Not judging others, but looking and inviting God into the experience of birth.

We had been praying about this issue a lot over the course of my pregnancy. I had desired to have a home birth since my forth pregnancy, but when I had complications with my back last January -March that dream died. I had doctors recommending a scheduled cesarean, but in my heart I didn't trust their diagnosis. If I would have had a cesarean and had a "bad bleed" who know how the recovery would have gone? I might not have had the hemorrhage, we will never know. What I do know is that after much prayer and meditation over the issue, the Lord seemed to raise me up and comfort me from much of my pain. The Neurosurgeon had told us to expect my back to get worse in the 3rd trimester and that I may need to be on bed rest again then. To our amazement in the Lord, I was able to function at a partially normal level. Yes, I still had massive back pain, but not like before. Yes, I could not bend or lift or take care of my family the way I normally did, but God provided 2 sweet girls to minister to our family coming on board to help us out for this season. Plus our own children really rose up and began to take on more responsibility. So in faith we trusted that my back would be ok and proceeded to go to Andaluz, knowing that it was just 3 minutes from OHSU.

My midwives were awesome, I am so glad I was at Andaluz. They were so calm b/c they had dealt with this so many times before. They were prepared with pitocin and IVs; however, I was having intense cramping already and wasn't really in need of pitocin. As far as an IV goes. That would have routine at the hospital, but bc I was already swelling up in my legs and around my eyes... my midwives decided it would have been worse for me bc I most likely would have puffed up everywhere retaining water. They gave me protein & fruit smoothies with herbs right away, Cramp Bark tincture, heating pad for my back and hot water bottle for my uterus and started me on Chlorophyll & iron supplements. I doubt I would have gotten such careful, sensitive care, with all the more natural supplements at the hospital. I think I might have been scared at home, maybe even panicked. I know that no amount of birthing books would have "trained" Isaac and I for what we encountered, so I am very thankful that I didn't birth at home. Plus what a mess! We wouldn't have been prepared for that and I most likely would have transported to the hospital if we were at home.

So yes I am so glad to have been where I was, with whom I was there with. I am so impressed with Andaluz Waterbirth center... they have now handled 2 extreme issues with me in my past 2 births so well. Luke was posterior and nearly 10 lbs- big guy... bc of their expertise his head was beautiful and the birth was only 4 hours long with no interventions (vacuum). Now this post partum hemorrhage.

I am also so thankful to the Lord for leading us to this decision for this particular birth. He was so present and I did get to have one of the best birth experiences I ever have. It was incredible and my faith has been strengthened!

So what am I doing to Build Blood Cells? I drink a mixture of Coconut MIlk with ChlorOxygen (chlorophyll concentrate) to build red blood cells -2 times per day, I also take 10ml of an iron & herb suppliment called Floradix before every meal ( both of these are found at New Seasons). I also take iron suppliment (pills), prenatals, a Calcium, Mag & Potassium suppliment at night bc Magnesium and Iron fight for minerals when digesting. My diet has been largely red meat and green leafy veggies until recently. Kelsey has been juicing Kale, spinach, along with yummy fruits to help me as well. A friend of ours also brought us Amaranth (pig-weed), which we sauteed with Kale and chard until it was gone! I have also been drinking Red Raspberry Leaf tea since about 4 -5 weeks before I gave birth. I believe it really helped in making the delivery easier and it is known as being the woman's womb tea.

Amaranth and Alfalfa have the highest levels of iron than any other veggie!

I will post about her yummy Kale Scramble another day!

Ethan's Birth Song

2010-09-24T10:48:00.000-07:00

Worship through Music is, for me, the most moving way to feel the presence of God and to experience Him speaking comfort and strength in times when I need Him most.
During the typical day, if I am feeling tired, cranky, unappreciated, or any of the other vast emotion of a woman and mother... if I put worship music on... it helps me to get the focus of myself and back where it should be... on the Lord, who He is, and what he has done.

Anticipating the most physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally challenging events a woman can ever experience in her lifetime, birth, I prepare music for the event.

Each of my children have special stories of their births, as every woman has.
My children's story of their birth and the few moments after can be characterized often by the song that randomly is chosen ( I believe by the Lord).
While I do pray about the songs I put on my ipod, there are about 150 songs and are set on shuffle. So it is very random how the song is selected.
In my last post I shared the songs that meant the most to me through the labor.
Here is the song that was playing when I delivered Ethan and the few minutes afterward.

"Depth of Mercy"
by Selah

Depth of mercy can there be

Mercy still reserved for me?

Can my God His wrath forbear,

Me, the chief of sinners, spare?

Heaven find me on my knees

Hear my soul's impassioned plea

Depth of mercy can there be

Mercy still reserved for me

Now incline me to repent,

Let me now my sins lament,

Deeply my revolt deplore,

Weep, believe, and sin no more.

Heaven find me on my knees

Hear my soul's impassioned plea

Depth of mercy can there be

Mercy still reserved for me

Heaven find me on my knees

Hear my soul's impassioned plea

Depth of mercy can there be

Mercy still reserved

Mercy still reserved for me

There were moments I remember singing this song in labor and being deeply moved... and then moments when I was so focused I don't remember the words but I was at peace.

Then as Ethan was born, I was so moved by how the Lord spared me pain in my back... which is truly a miracle and testimony to his power, empathy to pain, and mercy. Being so thankful for His grace at that moment, I cried out ..."The Lord had mercy on your mother!"

My prayer is that as Ethan grows... like the lyrics in this song profess... Ethan would be "inclined to repent" and "weep, believe, and sin no more." That Ethan would have the kind of communion with the Lord I have been so grateful to experience. That the Lord would hear his "soul's impassioned plea."

Mercy was reserved for me and is for you as well!
Our God is a great God and has the power to heal, give mercy, and protect!

Upcoming Posts

2010-09-21T23:38:00.000-07:00

My next Posts are going to be topics dealing with Birth & Postpartum.

I have learned much through my 6 postpartum experiences and feel the Lord asking me to be transparent and real about the struggles as well as the healing I have experienced.

Topics I plan on covering:

Ethan's Birth Story

Postpartum Hemorrhages- Experience & Care

Postpartum Homeopathy & Personal Care

Bonding, Breastfeeding & Fertility

Dealing with Hormones, Anxiety & Emotions

Spiritual Rest & Healing Postpartum

40 days of Healing

Adjusting- "Our New Normal"

Labor of Love

2010-09-21T22:19:00.000-07:00

"A Labor of Love"

Ethan's Birth Story

After weeks of feeling like a "ticking time bomb" the day finally arrived. As the Sunday morning bustle commenced, I focused inward, trying to "read" my body. Was this the big day? Kids showering, getting all cleaned up for church, packing bags and all the usual details of the morning, but with added pleasure of Gramma's company. As Sarah & Isaac held down the fort I went for a little walk out in the Vineyard & around the property. It was a beautiful day and I seemed to noticed more of God's beauty than usual. Even the weeds looked extra healthy...and I didn't mind; instead I marveled. As I walked I would stop every few minutes to "focus." I still wasn't positive if I was going into labor. After all I had been dilated for weeks and for the first time, I was overdue. I was certain the baby was going to be huge. My last two were in the high 9 pounds and they were early and on time. A natural fear entered into me for an instant, what if this baby is 11 pounds and posterior again? Then as I kept walking, a song entered my heart ("Deliverer" by Vicky Beeching), the fear subsided and I felt strong. I had a confidence the Lord would be my strength, even if I had none.

I called my midwife and talked to her as Isaac was loading the kids to go to church. At that point I wasn't have regular contractions, instead I was just feeling pressure, but it was coming and going in waves like contractions. Adele was on her way to church so she told me to text her with updates. Just ten minutes later I was texting her, "This is the Real Deal, meet you at birth center." As the kids were riding bikes outside and enjoying time with Gramma before she was going to head back home... I felt like we should get to the Birth Center. Things began to progress quickly within the next 15 minutes. Isaac, Kelsey, and I headed for Andaluz Water Birth Center while Sarah waited for Keziah (our awesome helper through out the past 5 months) to stay with Luke & Drew. Then once Keziah arrived to take care of the little ones at home, Gramma Sarah brought Austin and Megan to the Birth Center.

Meanwhile, as we were driving to the Birth Center I could tell things were slowing down for me. As is usually the case when I get in the car to go. But I was ready to take this on, so I had Isaac pull over a couple times so I could get out and squat and use gravity to keep things moving along. We even managed to stop at Burgerville for Isaac to have a quick Burger! Kelsey was our contractions timer. She loved it, it was exciting!

Once we got to Andaluz things started to speed up fast. We had enough time to settle in and get my "birth music" playing. I always have a playlist of songs for labor and delivery that I pray over the weeks before. I go through the lyrics and meditate on them. Since birth is such a spiritual experience for me it is only natural that I would have worship music to meditate on & help me focus on the Lord while I am "bringing forth man."

All of my births were amazing experiences, each one unique. This one I would characterize as blessed of the Lord of Mercy. The Almighty was gracious to me and had mercy on me. He heard the cries of my pregnancy & blessed me. He new the desire of my heart was to glorify Him in all things... in raising this child he choose me to mother and to glorify him in labor and delivery. That I would be able to pass on a strong legacy to my daughters and my son who were there. Kelsey and Megan were both in the room with us and got to participate in the labor and delivery. Austin was there for most of the time. He went out when I first got in the tub and then came in and met his new baby brother immediately after his birth. I can not tell you how special it was to have my daughters there with me. Megan (5 yrs) had her hand on my shoulder, Kelsey(10) still timing and offering homeopathy loved being a part of this. To have them singing and worshipping with me and witnessing the birth of Ethan was an experience I look back on with so much delight.

Raising hands to worship the Lord through a contraction, praying to the Lord when I came upon the self-denial stage, and experiencing all of this with my husband. He was my main coach. Isaac was a gentle but strong man during this birth. He got to be in the tub with me this time because I didn't have the desire to be on my knees. He came in and held me up so I could float. I am certain this added in relieving pain in my back, as well as speeding up the process of birth. Ethan descending so quickly and I can truthfully share it was one of the easiest births even though he was 9 lbs 1 oz. Isaac delivered Ethan... the first one he personally delivered and he did a great job. We enjoyed hanging out in the tub for about 40 minutes... just praying, and embarrassing the moment.

Ethan was born in a 1 hour and 45 minutes from the time we got to the Birth Center. His birth was the second fastest of all my births, but was the most enjoyable. After his birth the first thing I cried out was "The Lord had Mercy on your Mother!" I meant it. I was amazed... my back didn't hurt during the delivery at all. That was a new experience for me. In my mind it was my "perfect" birth. I praise God Almighty for his Strength, Nurturing, and Mercy.

I would like to share the lyrics to the song that Ethan was born to. Each of my children has birth songs. It is so special for me to remember their births when I hear these songs... it brings back the beautiful memories of these most spiritual times in a my life. In my mind, the birth experience is the only experience in a woman's life that can challenge her so deeply, physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. It affects the mind, body and soul in a way like no other. My heart has always been to purposefully dedicate this event in my life to Jesus and invite Him to be present and in charge.

Here are the Lyrics to a Song that means so much more to me now that it helped me stay focused on Christ during Transition.

"My Beloved"

by Kari Jobe

You're My Beloved

You're My Bride

To sing over you is My delight

Come away with Me My love

You're Beautiful to Me

So beautiful to Me

Under My mercy

Come and wait

Till we are standing face to face

I see no stain on you

My child

You're Beautiful to Me

So Beautiful to Me

I sing over you My song of peace

Cast all your care down at My feet

Come and find your rest in Me

I'll breathe My life inside of you

I'll bear you up on eagle's wings

And hide you in the shadow of My strength

I'll take you to My quiet waters

I'll restore your soul

Come rest in Me and be made whole

You're My beloved

You're My Bride

To sing over you is my delight

Come away with me my love

"Lord's Prayer Deliver Us"

by Selah

Our Father in Heaven hallowed be Thy name

Thy Kingdom come Thy will be done

On earth as it is in heav`n

For Thine is the Kingdom

Thine is the Power and Glory forever

Forever amen.

Give us Lord give us

This day our daily bread

And forgive us forgive us Lord

Forgive us of our debt

For Thine is the Kingdom

Thine is the Power and the Glory forever

Forever amen amen.

Lead us from temptation lead us from

Temptation but Deliver us Deliver us

From evil to thy salvation

For thine is the Kingdom

Thine is the Power and the Glory forever amen.

Thine is the Kingdom Thine is the Power

And the glory forever forever Amen Amen

These songs along with many others on my "birth play list" were such a comfort and made labor & delivery easier and I was able to focus on God and experience His strength in my life as I sang and worshipped Him through the contractions. Sometimes just being quiet and not singing, but listening and focusing on the words helped me to totally surrender to Christ being in control of Ethan's birth. I believe that when a woman can surrender to the process for which God created their body to function, birth is much easier, not easy by any means, but easier and more delightful. If you go into childbirth with the anticipation of meeting God there, it can be exciting and you can walk away feeling empowered. Empowered knowing you were created for this good work.

I will share Ethan's Song on my next post!

I hope you are blessed by the music playing...

I tried to put some songs that were mentioned in these posts and that were included in my birth music play list.

Eleven Years & Still Running on Ultra Fast Mode!

2010-09-19T23:21:00.000-07:00

Isaac & I are celebrating our 11th year of Marriage today!

I joke with him, that since we meet we have been moving at a mile a minute...

and I feel like it for sure!

11 years later... love...6 beautiful blessings... delightful hard work... dreams accomplished... still dreamin'... health issues & healing... growth... perserverance... learning... repentance... forgiveness... more love... understanding... team effort... working together...

more learning... sin apparent & grace given... living the days on purpose... keeping each other strong... when one is weak- the other is strong... more dreamin'...

setting goals... accomplishing them... changing goals... realizing God's giftings...

Learning selflessness... learning patience...studying each other and learning...

Experiencing Him more in our Marriage...

More Love...

Life- what a blessing- what a journey it has been already- can't wait to see what the next years hold!

I Love You Isaac!

Drew Bug's Birthday!

2010-09-19T23:04:00.000-07:00

What A Star!

Here he is... on his Birthday Date with Mom & Dad!

Another August Birthday!

Wow am I behind on blogging!

Where does the time go when you are recovering from childbirth and have six children???

Better Late than Never though...

Here are some great pictures of my sweet blessing Drew.

He just turned four August 24th and always has a smile on his face!

What a year of growth this year was for Drew...

Here are pictures of Drew with Me... (mommy made him a new JOhn Deere Tractor Blanket)... and the rest of the gang all admiring his very first...

big boy remote control HONK-A-TOMPTER (helicopter)!

He was SOOOO excited!

On a more serious note though...

I am so proud of the young lad he is becoming...

He has really learned so much in the area of self control,

patience, and having control over his emotions...

well for a four year I think he is amazing!

We have such a neat testimony about the promises of God being fulfilled in this little man's life and I want to celebrate them and what God has done in his life.

Thank you Lord for answered prayers!

Learning to Quilt w/ Gramma

2010-09-18T22:41:00.000-07:00

While we were in "Waiting" for Ethan to be born...
Isaac's Mom came to help out.
While she was here she taught Kelsey how to quilt!
Here she is at 10 quilting, when her own mom has not even done by 31 years of age!

Thanks for coming Sarah, you were a huge help...

I still can't believe you and Kelsey got it done in 3 days!

Ethan @ 8 days old!

2010-09-04T14:47:00.001-07:00

My Six Beautiful Blessings!

Thank You Jocelyn for coming out and doing such an amazing job "capturing" our family again. I feel so blessed to have these days photographed so when I am older I can reminise with my memories in color (& black & white)!

If you are interested in having Jocelyn Gillson out to your home for family photos... you can check her & husbands work out at Rowan Gillson Imagery.
They do weddings together, Rowan teaches photography classes at Cascade Christian College. You can also contact Jocelyn at jocelyn.elise@gmail.com

How to Use Your Embassy!

2010-08-26T22:37:00.000-07:00

SAVE THE DATE FOR OUR NEXT BANQUET:
“How to Use Your Embassy!”
RSVP Today!

You are invited to The Household Embassy Movement’s next banquet on Thursday, Sept. 9th from 6:30-8:30 p.m. We hope you will join us at the beautiful Persimmon Country Club in Gresham for wonderful food, inspiration and practical direction from Gregg Harris, one of the principal leadership voices in the church today. Gregg will speak on “How to Use Your Embassy” going deeper into how to be an ambassador to further impact your community for Christ.

Remember, this is a FREE event. Our goal is to provide you with a relaxing evening and a chance to catch the vision, connect with others, enjoy an appetizing meal, and simply unwind. The banquet isn't a fundraiser or sales pitch, but a time of encouragement, and fellowship.

We had an uplifting time at the last banquet, God is working and doing something meaningful. Persimmon Country Club is a comfortable, no-pressure environment for anyone who might be interested in learning about becoming an ambassador for Christ, so don’t forget to share this invitation with others!

RSVP here - and we’ll see you there!
Do you want to know how to help? Here are some things you can do!
Contact us: info@householdembassy.org

He has a Name!

2010-08-18T18:27:00.000-07:00

ETHAN CREED TOLPIN
Proverbs 22:1
"A good name is more desirable than great riches, to be esteemed is far better than silver or gold."

Ethan: Hebrew, Meaning: Firmness, Steadfast in Truth
Romans 8:28
"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose."

Creed: Latin, Meaning: Belief, Power in Faith
Matthew 8:10
"Truly I tell you, in no one in Israel have I found such faith."
(Also motivated by the "Apostles CREED")

We believe the Lord has known us all, His creation before we even came to be. In Psalm 139 the Lord "knows our words" before they are spoken, so of course He knows us by our Names as well.

Psalm 139

¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

¹⁶ your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

After much prayer, deliberation and getting know our new little guy... we are privileged the Lord has given us the task to honor Him in our naming Ethan Creed Tolpin.

Please pray with us that he comes to fulfill the core meanings of his name. That he would be firm in his walk with the Lord, Steadfast in Truth, that He would have Power in Faith! All to the Glory of the Kingdom of God. May you rise up son, to declare the Name of the Lord in strength, power & truth relying on the deep faith comes from knowing Christ personally!

Back Home

2010-08-18T17:05:00.001-07:00

The Best Birthday Ever!

2010-08-18T16:53:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the best birthday ever for me...
We came home from Andaluz Waterbirth Center
to be reunited & surprised!

Kelsey made me a beautiful homemade cake!

All the children joined in to make posters and this beautiful stepping stone for my garden!

I am so thankful for you children!

Blessed with another Son!

2010-08-16T16:03:00.000-07:00

The Lord has blessed us with another healthy son!

Baby Tolpin arrived yesterday @ 12:45 in the afternoon!
9lbs 1oz.
20.5"
with a Hercules chest of 14.5"
long fingernail and a little bit of curly dark hair

Anticipation

2010-08-07T21:29:00.000-07:00

"Are we going to have the baby today mom?"
"How do you feel Angie?"
"Anything???"

Everyone is excited around here these days. Waiting in anticipation for the "arrival" of the new baby! It is an exciting time in a family's life. Very personal & special... not many other experiences in life truly compare to the birth of another member of a family or the "birth of a son or daughter." For the woman giving birth it is an especially intimate, introspective time. Every woman prepares for birth differently of course. Some are relaxed and have an aire of confidence there body will do what its supposed to and so they just go with the flow calmly, some women are so wound up nervous they feel scared...the unknowing of what will happen over comes them... they don't like not being in control. Then there is the in between crowd... they aren't paranoid or nervous (maybe a little, but thats normal), but they exhibit confidence and emotional stability.
Having giving birth naturally 5 times already, I can say that you don't just "become a pro" like some may think (or say). The anticipation still gets to you a bit... you still have moments of doubt... maybe even moments of fear, but those can all be overcome through Christ who gives us strength. When I was pregnant with my first born, I wanted to be educated so Isaac and I attended prebirth classes, I read as many books on pregnancy and childbirth I could find. To my dismay, I only found 1 good book ("The Christian Woman's Guide to Childbirth" by Debra Evans) that had a strong solid Christian foundation when it came to natural childbirth. Now there are more resources and I have benefited from a few; however, Nothing prepares you more for childbirth than studying the scriptures on the topic. When I was pregnant with my fourth I decided to go through scripture and write out every verse that related to pregnancy or childbirth in the Bible. What the Lord showed me was far greater than what I could have read in any childbirth book.

In Genesis 4:1 Eve gives God the Glory for the birth of her son when she says...."With the Help of the Lord I have brought forth a man."

Eve didn't do it on her own... she is giving Him the glory and praising Him for His part in the creation and birth of a son. How is this missed in Christian Childbirth books? In my mind this is so critical to truly experiencing God in the process.As Christian women we should learn a lessn from Eve. She was the first woman God created, she was the first woman to disobey God and he personally punished her (and all women) with pain in childbirth, but even though that existed... she Glorified and praised him. Was she overwhelmed with the joy of her baby boy? Yes, but she was still very much in pain... she had another son to birth... in between there births she praised God. Shouldn't we do the same?
Now, I am not in any way trying to knock the "Bradley Method" or any other great books out there on Childbirth... ("Ina May Guide to Childbirth" although I do have to warn people about the new age stuff in this book, "Gentle Birth Choices" by Barbara Harper- founder of Waterbirth International and my first midwife when I gave birth to Kelsey under water) all I am saying is in all the preparing we do as women do we get into scripture and rely on God completely? When you are packing your birthing bags and nesting getting every thing "just right" for the arrival of the new baby... do you prepare spiritually for one of the most spiritually, emotionally, physically, and mentally challenging experiences you will ever get the privilege of experiencing.... and prepare to invite the Lord of Lords into your experience?
I have to be honest, I have for many years hesitated in sharing these thoughts with women... not wanting to make people feel judged. I am sharing now b/c until this week I wasn't preparing like I had the other five times. I was distracted by nesting, activities with the other five children, business adventures with my husband, household projects, etc... the list could go on and on. So I began to get anxious last week, feeling unprepared. Not b/c I didn't have my bags packed, b/c I did. Not b/c I didn't read the childbirth books through again, b/c I did. But because I hadn't rested in the strength & peace that comes only from the Lord and being in HIs Word Deeply. For me, I have always given my birth experience to Jesus 100%... all of me. I bring worship music to keep my focus on Him and that He knows more pain than I. Keeping my perspective clear. I have family to be praying over me. I sing during and in between contractions, I pray, I cry out for God to help, He is my focus, the fact the He is giving me this gift of a child is the focus. I am not trying "sleep" through the contractions. I am not trying to have a "painless birth" b/c scripture says we will have pain. Instead I accept it, and I ask Him who is able to help me and give me strength to Glorify Him in those moments. And when I have self doubt... HE is the ONLY one that "brings forth man."
I have been so incredibly blessed to have the Holy Spirit present at every birth, whether in the Hospital or Birth Center, God is not to be put in a box.... he can be everywhere- anywhere! And he wants to be! I have always had the perspective and openness during my labor & delivery to let my light shine before men through the process. God has blessed it ten fold spiritually for me. Each of my children have a "birth song;" a song they were born too. I remember after my longest labor, Drew (my 4th), he was 9lb 7 oz big guy... 16 hours... and I was at 10 cm FOREVER... the nurses linked arms and started singing "Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee, God of Glory, Lord of Might" which was the song that was playing when he was born. Who knows if they were Christians or not... they were moved. That birth was at Kaiser Permanente. They experienced God with us... in His Sovereignty & Mercy. I thank God He allowed me to be a light. One nurse had never seen a natural birth before and was so moved she came to see us everyday we were there (very out of the normal). My point is... it is so easy for us to waste our energies "nesting" or getting ready for the baby, but I we putting our energies in the right places. Are we preparing to have music and prayer, are we preparing for this to be an opportunity to witness or to mentor up our daughters (let them come), are preparing for an exciting journey of letting God be in control. Inviting Him to be present and helping you.
I am back, I am confident, not in myself, but in my God b/c He has never let me down. He has always shown up when I needed him most and blessed my marriage and my relationship with my children b/c I have given it to him.

Thank you Lord for allowing me the time I needed, even by going "over due," to get back with you, spiritually prepared for the adventure to come. I am not anxious, but confidant that the baby will come in your timing, which is always perfect, even when we don't understand why. And thank you for showing me why already and speaking to me through your word.

May I Glorify you while I am in Labor... may I "praise you in the storm" and give thanks to you fr you are good in all things. May I call on you to help me and remove my burden through the relief of birth. May I praise you through it all and when my work is done in birth, give me the strength Lord to continue to prepare and give you my days as I raise this son you are girting me with. Let my energy not be in vain, help me to stay the course and stay motivated all the days I am called to raise him for your Kingdom's Work. His birth is one very quick event... help me not to forget to prepare spiritually for the every days of training him up with the same diligence and perseverance. Thank You Jesus, for understanding our pains... and blessing us through suffering by making us stronger. I look forward to this sacred time with you Father in Heaven.
Amen

Household Embassy Banquet

2010-08-04T23:28:00.000-07:00

Isaac & I are excited about going to the 1st ever Household Embassy Banquet and would like to invite you all to be our guests!

We are anticipating this event to be a night of connecting with like-minded people and learning more ideas of how to impact the community for the Glory of God.

Why are we so excited?
This is a rare opportunity for Christians to unite and come together from all different churches & denominations, to be encouraged in their faith as we walk purposefully as a team for the Kingdom of God. The topics of the message at the Embassy Events will be slightly different each time... always focusing on our job of being purposeful with the time we have been given here on earth for the Glory of God & His Kingdom.

Have you ever felt uncomfortable inviting someone to church, not sure if that is "crossing a line?" Or wanted to have fellowship with other believers but didn't feel it appropriate to invite them to your church b/c they already are happy at another church (since it would be church pride to try to get people to change when it isn't God's plan)? Well this is an opportunity to invite all kinds of people. The gospel message will be shared so this is a great opportunity to invite that family down the street and introduce them to Jesus, but it is also going to be spiritually stimulating & encouraging for the already strong Christian leader. A place to "Come together."
This is not in any way an attempt to promote any specific church... the leadership team currently represents 3 different churches in the local area and has a vision to grow and expand to impact this Culture and Community.

For more info please go to the website: Household Embassy

Please Remember to RSVP & let us know if we will see you there!

God Bless!

The 1st due date-

2010-08-04T08:05:00.000-07:00

Today was the first due date given that I would meet our son for the first time... and here I am... no change... Since I have NEVER gone over due... had 2 babies on their due dates... and two 11 days early... and one daughter 13 days early.... I am in a bit of nervous uncharted territory! I tend to have big babies... no really BIG babies...

Here is the run down... Kelsey (8.5lb-due date)... Austin (8.3lbs-11 days early)... Megan (7.9lbs-13 days early)... Drew (9.7 lbs-11 days early)... Luke (9lbs 10 oz- due date- posterior)... so now I am almost overdue and getting SCARED! Please be praying for me as I feel like I can hardly breathe he is so big in there! I have not really experienced this "done- can't move- can't wear pants- can't breathe very well" feeling before. I am trying to have a positive attitude and focus on the goodness of God and that the baby will come in God's good timing... but I REALLY wish I had him last week!

I can tell this morning he is in a posterior position again as well! Please pray for him to turn and for the delivery to go smoothly. May Jesus Christ be glorified in me and through me as I need His help to "bring forth man." I covet all your prayers! Thank you

Double Digits--"10"

2010-08-03T21:07:00.000-07:00

I'm officially feeling my age!
My eldest child, Kelsey just turned 10 this afternoon- 12:31pm!

Here are some highlights from here birthday at home!Last Week we took Kelsey on a date! She picked out a new Bible with her name engraved & off we went to her favorite place... Macaroni Grill!

This morning we surprised her with a spontaneous trip to Krispy Kreme Donuts for breakfast!

After going out with Dad for the afternoon, we had a special dinner & cake with some homemade presents!
Megan made Kelsey a tea cup and saucer at Ceramic Cafe while they were at Art School b/c Kelsey Loves Tea!

Drew & Luke finished off a book series Kelsey has just started called "Kingdom Dawn."

Austin carved a flower out of a piece of wood and painted it for her!

She was so excited to find a cross necklace!

Reading... What a great ending to a great day!

Capturing the Moments before Baby

2010-07-27T16:46:00.000-07:00

What better- than a favorite flower- Black Eyed Susan given as a gift from my daughter- to make the cutest heart over my heart!

My delights and joy in my life!

I have always wanted to have Maternity Pictures taken...
to remember the days of pregnancy...
capture the precious memories w

Sadly, as I looked into photographers, I was always concerned about how indecent the pictures were and that it wouldn't really capture Us!

Plus there was always the $$$ issue.
I am so blessed to have found a treasure in Jocelyn Gillson (Edlin)!
This sweet young newly wed had so much enthusiasm about photography and loves taking maternity/ family shots! She truly captured us as a family and couple! We had so much fun and realized our property is so much more beautiful through her eyes than we ever thought. She chose unique locations around our property to take the photos... It was a blast!Her husband Rowan teaches photography classes at Cascade College and they have their own photography business, where they shoot weddings, missions trips, families, etc...Their website is down right now, but if you are interested in having Jocelyn or her husband Rowan out you can reach her at jocelyn.elise@gmail.com
Thanks Jocelyn,
we really enjoyed having you with us that afternoon! Sorry about the bee sting! =)

Hiding behind the Blue Balloon!

Here he is... the Love of my life!

"The American Way"

2010-07-23T21:41:00.000-07:00

Tonight I was getting caught up with some friends blogs and ironically my friend, Brenda wrote this post, which totally fits in with what my last post was about... "Work Ethic!"
I can't tell you how many times Isaac and I have had conversations with friends on this same issue Brenda. Your post was very tastefully written and sums up a HUGE issue today's parents need to recognize.
You are totally fair and right to say "farming isn't for everyone." We feel the same way... sometimes we get tired and feel it isn't for us either! =)
However, there are other ways to teach work ethic!
The key is to be parenting purposefully against the tide of mediocrity in this country.
Purposefully teach servant hood, selflessness and gratefulness; rather than indulging desires and the entitlement attitude of "I Deserve!"
So go check out Brenda @ SeriousMoms.com

Work Ethic & the Vineyard

2010-07-23T08:09:00.000-07:00

Many people ask us about the Vineyard...

Did we plant it? What kind of grapes are they? Why did we choose to have a vineyard? Did we grow up on Vineyards? How do we know what to do? How much time does it take? Is it a lot of work? What are you doing with the grapes?

Here is some of our story...

Most people we would randomly meet in the course of life either say things like, "Wow, a Vineyard, I've always wanted to own a vineyard?" or "Vineyards are beautiful... I didn't know you could grow grapes out here." The best 2 ice breakers we have are how many children we have and the Vineyard.=) The awsome thing is that the two go together. It's amazing how much of an opportunity the vineyard has become in helping us share with people about our strong belief in purposefully teaching our children work ethic and how it glorifies the Lord to delight in work.

Did we plant the Vineyard ourselves?
Yes we did! However at first we did hire some help for certain projects. We hired someone with a tilling tractor 3 years ago to help us till the land b/c we didn't have a tractor at the time. Isaac and our Neighbor Jesse, who has become a good friend, fell a HUGE, half dead tree that used to sit in the middle of the field where the Vineyard is now. That was a big job! Isaac, with the help of the kids... used Geometry to plan our the scape for the vineyard (the rows), they staked it out. Then we hired help to put the end posts in. Then once that day came, 2 yrs ago in October, the plants were delivered-- 1286 of them. We dug every hole, filled every hole with water, planted every plant, staked every vine, and protected each one with a grow tube and tied it to the first grow wire. It was the most productive day for our family. Luke was just a few months old and so he either worked along with me in a baby pack or in the stroller. (People often say "how do you loose weight after a baby... this is a HUGE part of it... we have physical work to do daily... weekly on our farm, whether it is hauling 50 lbs of chicken pellets, 5 gallon can of water out to the chickens, cleaning their coop, squatting to prune all 1286 plants, watering the garden weeding, etc...) Work is what God made us for... when you have this kind of work, you don't need a gym! =) We had an assembly line going and worked hard all day that first day. It took us about 2-3 weeks to get it planted although most of the work got done in one day! We worked until the moon was our light with no real breaks.

Since then we prune between 2-4 times per year... which has required taking grow tubes on and off as well. We do all the pruning ourselves. Those plants are like our babies... very fragile. We are going organic, so that means weeding when we need to weed... not spraying round up like most other Vineyards. This year we have only hired help to weed whack around the plants twice... that takes 4 guys about 15 hours. We have to mow twice down each row, which the kids love- they get to ride most the time (Usually takes about 3-4 hours). So during the late Spring and Summer, Saturdays are our work day as a family. Us girls go to the Farmers Market for what produce we don't grow and then once we get home we spend the rest of the day working outside... taking care of the farm. In pruning seasons, which take us longer since only 2 of the kids can prune so far, we also usually have on average 2 nights per week that we work a few hours after dinner. Then there is the regular work with the animals everyday!

Do the kids like working in the Vineyard?
Not always, but that was why we planted it years ago. To teach them to delight in work. In working together as a team as well. We are building something, not just a vineyard, a legacy of our kids working together well and delighting in work. Usually after we get started a few still have a "bad attitude," but that provides us as parents the opportunity to teach, pray and correct. There are wonderful God Glorifying days though, when the kids are excited and go out to work and they work so hard and get so much done. What a joy those days are and what fun to praise them for a job well done.

Since Isaac works with a young generation, for years we have observed many things about the changing generations. For example, sometimes the "more privileged" children are the hardest at getting to work. Since they are in sales, usually sales comes easy for them at first, but then once things get hard and they receive rejection or a "no" they want to quit. They don't "need" to work b/c mommy and daddy pay for it all. They think they will always be ok. This is not true for all privileged though, it is refreshing when we see those that are blessed that had parents who wouldn't let them take it for granted, but instead instilled in their children a strong work ethic and purposefully tried to mentor them into entrepreneurial thinking. Often, not always, but often times it is those kids that have learned to persurvere through struggles that make it and move up. Another joy is in meeting those who have immigrated from other countries, such as China or Russia. There stories are inspiring, and they help you to value the opportunity we really do have here in America. In a day when many freedoms are getting threatened. We still have massive opportunity! Most children grow up being asked the question, "what are you going to be when you grow up?" Versus the question, "What is needed today that you could create? What kind of contribution do you feel God calling you to give to this world?" You see, we believe most people today live with "victim" mentality. They are victims and don't like their profession, they just do it, out of obligation to "providing" for a family. The problem is not that they are working hard to provide, sometimes people go through hard times and those times can require people to have to do things they don't desire over others. However, instead of having a victim mentaltiy and getting depressed about it... shouldn't we praise God for the job and delight in serving Him in what we do. Shouldn't we a Christians look around at where God has planted us and look for opportunities to be on purpose, not only sharing the gospel, but letting people into our lives, loving them, and walking them to the Savior. We aren't here to prune vineyards, or deliver food, or sit at a desk and run meetings... we are here to connect with our Savior as we delight in doing those things and lead others to Cross by being a light with our attitudes of Joy. The fruit of the Spirit in our Lives should attract others to Him.We are trying to create in our children the desire to work hard and have the habit of working while delighting in the work. When so many kids just come home from school and plop down in front of the TV, our kids are reading, playing instruments, working in the vineyard, working in the home, and being productive. We do have sometimes were we enjoy a video together... but with the standard of watching things that teach or edify us.

Here I am in all my pregnant glory in the middle of 5 hour day of mowing the property last Saturday!
I may not be able to bend to do the pruning but I can mow! You should see how squished we get on here with a couple children on the lap- oh its fun!

I will answer the other questions on posts to come!

May you Glorify God in Delighting in What ever work you are assigned to!

Expanding the Egg Business

2010-07-23T07:33:00.000-07:00

Kelsey has long been dreaming of expanding the egg business!
She has been blessed with an abundance of customer requests...
so yes we have a waiting list!

Since we would have to expand the current living structure for the chickens to have more we aren't able to take on baby birds now.
However, thanks to our friends the Knifongs we did get to inherit 2 young white leg horns... they aren't laying yet, but soon Kelsey anticipates 2 more eggs a day!

Total count of chickens in Kelsey's care: 13!

Thank you Knifong family...
special thanks to Brie Ella!

The Girls are Helping Get Ready for Baby

2010-07-22T08:03:00.000-07:00

We have a few little boys that LOVE Blankets in our house! Well Actually all of us do.
When Winter comes we live in blankets... with a nice smelling warm fire... we wrap up in blankets, sit on the sofa, and read, read, & READ!
On any given day you can find Kelsey wrapped up in a blanket, on the floor or on her bed... doing her math (often times more math than she is assigned), Austin wrapped in a blanket doing his aloud reading, Megan wrappped in a blanket doing "explode the code," Drew and Luke Cuddled up in blankets... napping...

The point is-- we really like blankets. Especially homemade fluffy ones right after they come out of the dryer! =)
Since baby is coming any time now... and we are going to need the baby blankets we have been making new bigger, toddler size blankets for Luke!
Here are the girls giving Luke his new John Deere farm blanket!
(upper picture)Here is Kelsey with a blanket she made by herself for the new baby yesterday!
I learned how to sew baby blankets on the sewing machine when I was 23- pregnant with Austin. Kelsey is not even 10 yrs old yet!
What a great opportunity! She loves sewing-- and she is getting fast too!

A Special Date with Megan

2010-07-22T07:26:00.000-07:00

Megan is my little artist at heart...as well as my lovey girl!

She is the kid in the house that needs more affection and attention at times lately.She used to be so "easy"... never really had tantrums... which I thought was b/c of child training, but have realized after having more than 3, that I was just very blessed with having a gentle quiet spirited daughter. Now that she is 5 and a half ( which is so shocking to me), I am feeling this urgency to "know" her better and bring her under my wing, as I did her older sister.
Megan is our middle child in the bunch; she is also directly in the middle of a bunch of boys. Most people would think, wow, she must be tough to be in the middle of so many boys. Many have asked "is she a Tom-Boy?" Nope- not my Megan. She is VERY Feminine! She is a little girly girl that loves to wear pink, dance with her big sister, cook in the kitchen with mommy, play the piano (which she loves doing 5-6 times a day--making her music up now- and its really good), and do any kind of craft or art.
I am very aware that being the middle of 5-6 kids she could possibly "fall through the cracks" and so I am purposefully pursuing bringing her up under my wing. I decided a couple weeks ago to reassign the buddy system to the kids. Megan gets to be the new baby's buddy!
She is SO excited and this is a way to make sure I spend more purposeful time with her like I did the others. This may be her last chance to see mommy give birth so she is excited to experience that with me, learn how to change a newborns diapers, help with baths, help keep him "happy" when he gets older, etc...When Kelsey & Austin went to Art Camp 2 weeks ago, she was pretty upset she wasn't old enough to go... so one of the days we they were gone I took her on a date to the Ceramic Cafe. We had so much fun just talking and making Kelsey's birthday present together!
Here she is painting a tea cup and saucer for her sister's 10th birthday.

Announcing Mr. & Mrs. Tim Knutsen!

2010-07-17T09:19:00.000-07:00

Congratulations Tim & Tonya!

Thursday my brother exchanged vows!
We love Tonya and are so excited for them.
The kids can now call her "Auntie Tonya"

Four of the kids got to be in the wedding!
They had so much fun getting dressed up!
Our prayer for you is that as you begin this journey of marriage and oneness, you would strive to pursue one another and Christ. Don't settle for the goal of "surviving" marriage and being part of the statistic that doesn't get divorced... aim high you guys!
Strive for the ultimate goal...
To Glorify God in your marriage!
We pray you both love one another deeply,
never give up being a student of your spouse,
enjoy one another & stay friends.
Live today working towards the end goal...
Decide what you want your marriage to be like in 50 years from now...
Ask yourself the question?
"What will it take to get there?"
"What kind of Legacy do we want to leave?"
Set out goals to get there and have fun on this new journey along the way...
serving one another!

Blessings & We Love You!

Masters School of Art Camp

2010-07-15T06:39:00.001-07:00

Last Week Austin & Kelsey attended "Art Camp" for the first time. I first learned about MSOA 3 years ago at one of the home school conferences. I was so impressed by their approach of teaching technique and variety of classes, but my children were not yet old enough. Well they have expanded, they are closer now.... meeting in the downstairs of Sunnyside Foursquare Church. They have classes starting in the fall... everything from Celtic & Hebrew Dancing to Choir & Guitar. Their Art classes are what they are "known" for though... Painting... Portrait Drawing... and so much more.Here are some of the fun things the kids came home with after just 4 days.

We were astonished!
Go check out there website...
these home schooled kids are doing some pretty amazing Art!
And learning more about Jesus through devotionals while they are there!

These are from their Cartooning Class...

Kelsey's Painting from a picture!Austin with his painting!

For more info on MSOA go to www.msoaonline.com
Go to there "art Gallery" tab and check out the amazing Art these young people are doing!

Onion Poltices

2010-07-14T06:09:00.000-07:00

Allergies, colds and a horrible cough!

The night before last Luke woke up around 3 am with a horrible cough.
It was one of those coughs that gags and scares a parent into bringing the child to bed with you.
After trying water and seemingly appropriate homeopathies an hour later he was still coughing and gagging... about every 20-40 seconds.

I looked up alternative treatments for whopping cough in my homeopathy books and learned about an Onion Poultice.

So at around 4 am I went downstairs and proceeded to cook one up.
To my Surprise and Delight
It worked like a Miracle!
His coughing stopped right away... and Luke Loved it! He didn't squirm at all.... just cuddled in my arms with the poultice on his chest and neck, looking up at me with a grin every now and again.
Here's how to make an Onion Poultice:

Saute diced yellow onion in a little olive oil
Place onion into a wash cloth
when it is cooled down enough (test with elbow)
place compress (cloth & onion) on chest and neck until it cools down

Amazingly, the onion retain there heat for a little more than an hour

I know this sounds crazy... but when you are desperate... you'll even get up in the middle of the night to dice up and saute onion

Luke's 2!

2010-07-10T07:46:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Son!

He's Getting So Big!
For His Birthday he got his BIG Bonk!
It Totally suits his personality...
Rough & Tumble!
That's what you get when you are playing hard outside
all the time!

He's All Boy!

Until We Meet Again Dearest Sono

2010-07-07T21:21:00.000-07:00

In Loving Memory of Sono Sato Harris

July 4th at 8pm
One of the most amazing women I have had the privledge of knowing, went to spend eternity with Her Savior Jesus Christ.

The Family would like to invite everyone to come to Sono's Memorial Service:

Saturday, July 10, from 10:30am - noon.

Here are the details:

Good Shepherd Community Church
28986 Southeast Haley Rd.
Boring, OR 97009
503-663-5280
www.goodshepherdcc.org

Though I only knew Sono a short time, the impact she has made on my family will carry on for the cause of Christ into Eternity.
Sono is known to many around the world as the wife of Gregg Harris (speaker, author, pastor), the mother of Josh Harris (author, pastor, speaker), Joel Harris (musician for the Lord), Alex & Brett Harris (The Rebelution Boys, authors & speakers), Sarah Harris (performer in True Heart Productions), Isaac Harris (Speech & Debate Champ), & her youngest son James (who is ten years old, yet according to his father has shown amazing maturity and strength through these past few months).
There was so much more to this woman... she was gentle, quiet spirited... yet she was a womanof strength who lived on purpose. One purpose... to serve her Savior. How did she serve? I can not accurately list the ways, but one thing I am sure of, she served her King through her service to her to husband and children. They are a reflection of being well taken care of and nurtured, both physically, educationally, and especially spiritually.
Sono left a powerful legacy through her children, and also through the women she has inspired over the years through her books,speaking, and relationships.
Being a home schooling mother of seven and a pastor's wife is a privilege but also a huge responsibility, and I watched her do it with grace, never losing sight of the most important things... her relationship to Christ, being a help meet to her husband, and being a mother.
The thing I admire most about Sono is how steadfast she was. If I was weary or tired, she always encouraged and edified with scripture, prayer and song... and never in a judgemental way.
I knew, she knew how busy life can get with so many little ones... she had experienced it. She understood what it was like to be married to a man with a passion and vision that compelled to him to be constantly building and growing; and she offered bibilical wisdom in how to be the best kind of help meet for that kind of man. Sono was transparent and real... but strong!On JoshHarris.com Josh quotes John Wooden-
"The best thing a man can do for his children is love their mother."

As a friend, Sono knew the important job we have as young mothers and did not ever try to consume time away from that purpose. She encouraged young mothers to put their best energies into their families, rather than other friendships and activities. I have learned that it is ok, not to be everything to everybody, and not to feel pressure from the world to try to be. My focus right now is my home and that is more than enough to keep me plenty busy. I finally have let go of all those extra expectations I used to put on myself, and I have to tell you, it has freed me up to delight in my children so much more. Sono taught me how to do that, not by telling me to, b/c that is so easy to do. We all know we need to delight in them and enjoy them b/c they grow up so fast. Instead she taught by her example, she did what she preached. She put the time in with her own kids, delighting in them along the way, and when they grew up she was ready to let them be adults. Sono laughed with my kids and I when she came to visit, she had such a joyful spirit. My children and I will greatly miss her.
I remember one time I was really down on myself... I was feeling like I wasn't getting "enough school" done with the kids b/c I was on semi bed rest. Instead of just saying, "oh you are going through a lot right now, you can't be expecting this from yourself, you need to just rest, why don't you put the kids in school," or something similar that you hear so often from the rest of the world. Instead, she understood the greater vision behind home schooling and had seen the benefits in her grown children... encouraging me with examples of times when she was ill or on bed rest and how God had something different for those kids to learn... other than science... they were learning selflessness and servant hood because it was necessary for them to help. Today, with the prosperity we have in America, kids are not learning work ethic, gratefulness, servant hood, selflessness, and how to delight in helping and having responsibilities. Today children are indulged, selfish, ungrateful, and spoiled rotten. She would tell me, "You can not teach a child to be a servant and never give them the opportunity to serve... no they need to develop the character quality of servant hood by doing it regularly." She encouraged me that what they were learning was something they can't teach in the classroom... character and love. She said my suffereing was not just for my learning but for my children and husbands learning as well. She opened my eyes to look for the good things I saw in my children through my incapabilites. And she was right, they were learning and serving. Recognizing that brought so much joy and peace to my soul. Sono was a kindred Spirit to me... we would often laugh at funny memories of similarities with our families. We grew close so quickly, then she was gone just as suddenly. I will especially miss seeing her worshiping the Lord on Sunday mornings with arms stretched out as wide as her tiny body would stretch. Sono sure knew how to worship, abandoned (wholly free from restraint) to God!

I am deeply, selfishly grieved that I won't see her again here, but rejoice that we will be reunited in Heaven with our Lord Jesus!
She through the integrity of her life has truly inspired me.
If I can raise my children to "do the hard things for Christ" with the gusto she has raised hers to, I will count myself blessed. Looking at the Fruit of her life... I see amazing fruit! I want to follow that example! Thank you Sono for blessing me with your friendship this past year, and setting the bar high, I respect you so much for that and I will miss you...

A Picture of Sono with her family... what a legacy!

"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gates." Proverbs 31:25-31

If anyone would like to contribute to the Harris' family to help off set bills you can make tax deductible contributions at the Noble Institute.

Happy 4th

2010-07-05T09:52:00.000-07:00

Thank you Lord for the fellowship
& Fun in celebrating a Holy Day!

We had a great night with our friends the Behnke Family!

Here are some highlights!

Smores!

Firework time!

Scared Kids!

Freedom Day

2010-07-04T14:36:00.000-07:00

Happy 4 th of July

Today is a Holy Day!
(Hol-i-day)

"Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord,
the people he chose for his inheritance."
Psalm 33:12

"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit is, there is freedom."
2 Cor 3:17

Today is the celebration of our nation's Independence.
Thankfully I praise Him b/c our country was founded by strong men of faith
who by their personal sacrifices fought for a freedom and liberty
to live, worship, and work
with out a government dictating how to do those things.
We have the freedoms we have today because of godly men who rose up.

We need more godly men to rise up today.
Our freedoms are slowly being taken away...
when we don't use them they get taken away!

We are in a battle for not only our freedoms, but in a battle for the Lord's blessing.
The Lord blesses the nation who calls on Him.
There is only one true God!
He will not be mocked or fooled!

Our country has taken the blessings from the Lord and neglected to continue to teach the principles, morals, character and integrity that this great nation was founded on.
These generations don't have the knowledge of what today really stands for, and the real costs men paid for us. Teens are out "partying" exercising more freedoms than they should even be allowed... taking for granted that our countries prosperity came from God. He is Our freedom.

Let us believers come together in Prayer for our Leaders, for our country's future, for our country's pride... let us be challenged by the thought that our "prosperity" has killed our gratefulness.... and our ungratefulness as a country has produced laziness.
For us parents, lets pray for our children, as they are the next generation.
Pray that they would be a new generation of educated, appreciative, and humble men & women that First Love the Lord Jesus Christ and dedicate their lives to purposeful service whatever it may be.
We need to pray that God continues to have mercy on our sinful country. As a whole, we have "voted" him out of nearly everything... people have tried taking him out of schools, out of politics, out of medicine & science, out of the family & marriage, and so much more!

While we celebrate what he has done! Let us get on our knees asking Him to help us put Him back as Lord of our great nation!